Neg Nick top investment tip

negativenick


Joined: 10/11/2008
Posts: 6023

Message Posted:
07/03/2009 22:39

Investments



If you had purchased £1000 of Northern Rock shares one year ago it would now be worth £4.95,



with HBOS, earlier this week your £1000 would have been worth £16.50,

£1000 invested in XL Leisure would now be worth less than £5,



But if you bought £1000 worth of Tennents Lager one year ago, drank it all, then took the empty cans to an aluminium re-cycling plant, you would get £214.



So based on the above statistics the best current investment advice is to drink heavily and re-cycle. I'm starting now.....

Lilli



Joined: 21/07/2008
Posts: 13081

Message Posted:
07/03/2009 22:48

oh god nick if only we could here. it breaks my heart what we throw out and multipy that y the number of bars restaurants we coud give them a lot of money xxxxxx

rtddci


Joined: 29/12/2007
Posts: 842

Message Posted:
07/03/2009 23:26

With the excellent craftsman in the TRNC, could they not take all that lovely scrap aluminium, and make it into a nice new Airbus A300 and flog it to Turkish Airways?

DONTY


Joined: 07/06/2007
Posts: 534

Message Posted:
08/03/2009 04:05

Or Helios in the south eh!

Nunu1


Joined: 31/03/2008
Posts: 536

Message Posted:
08/03/2009 04:10

negativenick, it appears with respect, that, you have a lot of time on your hands to sit down and work out statistics of this nature!



Question: Do you permantely live in TRNC?.....And If I may ask What is your True Profession/Mode De Employ?



nunu1

gary-monger


Joined: 01/02/2009
Posts: 36

Message Posted:
08/03/2009 12:50

nunu you numpty its a joke! dont they do smiling in london? Gaz

Nastynipper


Joined: 08/06/2008
Posts: 171

Message Posted:
08/03/2009 17:52

negativenick is this '' BLACK HUMOUR ? ''

negativenick


Joined: 10/11/2008
Posts: 6023

Message Posted:
08/03/2009 17:57

No Nastynip, this is black humour:



Mejia was trying to get a job in India .



The Personnel Manager said, 'Mujibar, you have passed all the tests, except one. Unless you pass it , you cannot qualify for this job.'



Mujibar said, 'I am ready.'



The manager said,

'Make a sentence using the words



Yellow , Pink and Green .'



Mujibar said,



'The telephone goes green, green ,



And I pink it up, and say,



' Yellow ' , this is Mujibar.'



Mujibar now works at a call centre.



No doubt you have spoken to him.



I know I have.

MrsSnakes



Joined: 19/12/2008
Posts: 1100

Message Posted:
08/03/2009 19:18

works for BT spoke to him today said yellow ! blue are you and i red yellow pink i'm goin mad ill call black ! yellow yellow !!!

rtddci


Joined: 29/12/2007
Posts: 842

Message Posted:
08/03/2009 19:40

As you know, I don't think there is any place on this BB for irony. In fact I (like many others on this forum) wouldn't know irony if it flew up and hit me in the face, which I hope it wont, obviously, very messy probably...