Hi mum and dad I am bisexual!!!

segmen


Joined: 05/12/2008
Posts: 120

Message Posted:
14/03/2009 16:32

I know a couple whom faced to this recently.

What would you do if your son walks in with his b/f and says that to you?

Only serious comments please.

Mum and dad are totally devestated and seeking help.

Thank you

cronos


Joined: 26/10/2008
Posts: 2093

Message Posted:
14/03/2009 16:37

I take it you mean Bisexual?



If they really love their son then they will accept it and continue to love him regardless.



If they can't...then it says a lot more about them than it does about him.

segmen


Joined: 05/12/2008
Posts: 120

Message Posted:
14/03/2009 17:02

Yes my apologies....its ment to be bisexual...

Yes infact they love their son regardless but because we live in a such a small community they are worrying that "what would other people say?"

Do you think that he was born with it? Or did they give him to much freedom to explore all? Or do you think he is just a curious?

Thank you

hattikins


Joined: 17/02/2008
Posts: 2793

Message Posted:
14/03/2009 17:09

Do you think he was born with it ?



Bisexuality is not a disease or handicap, it is part of this young mans makeup.

His sexuality is his business and that is what his parents should say to others who may pass comment, if they love their son and continue to support him then it does not matter what small minded people may think or say about it.

yorkie58


Joined: 16/09/2008
Posts: 245

Message Posted:
14/03/2009 17:12

What does it matter "Do you think that he was born with it? Or did they give him to much freedom to explore all? Or do you think he is just a curious?" Even if you knew it wouldn't change a thing.



it is hard for the parents to get their heads around it especially if it came as a bolt out of the blue. It happened to me and came as a big shock. Tell your friends there is no shame and to stand up and be proud of their son it doesn't matter one bit what other people may or may not say.

fire starter


Joined: 19/06/2008
Posts: 3401

Message Posted:
14/03/2009 17:14

we have two sons and if either came in and said the same thing i guess we would probably laugh.

but we wouldn't love them any less.

everyone to their own.

we have gay friends and we don't have a problem with it, its his choice they should just accept it.

i think there are lots of people in cyprus who are possibly gay but are afraid to say so.

he needs comending for his bravery.

kellybelly


Joined: 08/03/2009
Posts: 263

Message Posted:
14/03/2009 17:18

Right from an early age i have always said to my three children,hey if any of you ever want to tell me you are WHATEVER,no problem. firstly i don't think you choose your sexual preference,it just happens. I would not like any of my children to feel ashamed in any way of there preference.I think any parent should respect their offspring's preference.Mum and dad should get a life and accept this totally. I don't buy into a religious views about sexuality because i am proud to be an atheist.In Fact i despise religion it causes to many problems



Regards Pete.

denizkisi


Joined: 18/09/2008
Posts: 196

Message Posted:
14/03/2009 17:25

Wouldn't worry me at all. The parents should should be grateful:

a) that they have a son

b) that he is healthy

c) he respects them enough to tell them anything at all!!!!

pinkchilli


Joined: 30/11/2008
Posts: 689

Message Posted:
14/03/2009 17:35

I read in the book below, "Why men don't listen and women can't read maps" that your sexual preference(s) are established 6-weeks after conception.



Also, if you have gay/bisexual relatives, there is a higher probability that you will be gay/bisexual.



http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/reader/0752846191/ref=sib_dp_ptu#reader-page



Take a look at the web site, also, look through the topics. Click "next page" Fascinating.

Lemtich



Joined: 15/02/2007
Posts: 1487

Message Posted:
14/03/2009 17:40

When I was a nipper I thought some of the girls I knew were tri sexual!



Try anything!



Lem

Lilli



Joined: 21/07/2008
Posts: 13081

Message Posted:
14/03/2009 17:44

Msg 8 Denisksi I totally agree. I have never had to face it with my children but there could be a time when on of my grandsons could be. My love for him will never change. xx

pinkchilli


Joined: 30/11/2008
Posts: 689

Message Posted:
14/03/2009 17:49

What would you do if your current partner/wife/husband came home and told you they were bisexual?



Obviously, if they are already and you know, this will not be a great shock.



I'm trying NOT to imagine Guido arriving at the restaurant with his new best friend, Giovanni! LOL.



"It's alright Lilli darling, Gio is just helping me with the filling on my new tart".

kelvin


Joined: 18/12/2008
Posts: 377

Message Posted:
14/03/2009 18:05

i have a friend who's bisexual..



If he cant get it for nothing, he buys it!!

fire starter


Joined: 19/06/2008
Posts: 3401

Message Posted:
14/03/2009 18:13

there was a family in the street where we use to live.

the womans husband ran off and left her for another man.

it was terrible for her and the two kids.

they were all devastated, everyone did their best to help, but the poor woman just went to bits.

i think the local gp put her on medication in the end.

karakum5c



Joined: 18/03/2008
Posts: 1021

Message Posted:
14/03/2009 18:20

A guy i used to work with wife came home one day and told him she was a lesbian and her girlfriend was coming to stay and before anyone gets to excited no she kicked him out first.



Now thats what i call a kick in the teeth for any guy.

billybuck


Joined: 12/11/2008
Posts: 27

Message Posted:
14/03/2009 18:59

He should have said,mum,dad,i am dying of cancer,when they fell to the floor,only joking,i am only bisexual.

That would have put it into perspective

No1Doyen


Joined: 04/07/2008
Posts: 16617

Message Posted:
14/03/2009 19:25

The parents of this boy should be proud of him for being man enough to tell them of his feelings. Some would hide it and then the parents may have found out via a third party which would have been a terrible situation. If they love their son they should accept him for what he Is. It isn't as though he's dying or is a weirdo - he's just a normal guy with different feelings than the majority.



A friend of mine has a daughter who is gay. You wouldn't know if she were standing next to you. She is in a relationship with a partner and they have a beautiful home and fantastic jobs. They are wonderful girls and have the love and support of their parents. In fact both sets of parents meet quite regularly and have even holidayed together.



I hope this boys parents find the strength to tell their son they love him because it will give him strength also.

batterboy58



Joined: 20/04/2008
Posts: 442

Message Posted:
14/03/2009 20:46

Post deleted for Racist remark.

MsGarnet


Joined: 04/01/2009
Posts: 989

Message Posted:
14/03/2009 21:24

To put what neighbours or strangers think before the wellbeing of one's offspring is something I can't understand. We are all going to be talked about, either by a friend or stranger, for the rest of our lives, sometimes in a derogatory sense, sometimes in a kindly way, whichever it is, there is NOTHING on this planet any of us can do to stop others discussing us. I believe homosexuality is nature NOT nurture. What someone does in private is their business. A person is not defined by their gender, size, provenance, sexual orientation, colour or anything else BUT their heart mind and soul. Anyone who thinks otherwise, should look inside themselves and ask themselves - why? To those who allow a religious tome to dictate inform or instruct how they think behave and feel, I would suggest from hereon in, they learn to think for themselves instead.

DutchCrusader



Joined: 19/05/2008
Posts: 11280

Message Posted:
14/03/2009 21:59

Re msg 1 : The boy must pray more (says the loving Catholic church). He may get "cured" (not) or he may get pregnant (not). What a terrible problem for him and the parents (not).



PS. There must be board members who can come up with even worse problems (not).

Dusterbruce


Joined: 03/08/2007
Posts: 1125

Message Posted:
14/03/2009 22:12

Q. What is the difference between a heterosexual man and a bisexual man?







A. About 6 pints of lager!

Macha


Joined: 18/01/2009
Posts: 650

Message Posted:
14/03/2009 23:40

If my son told me he was gay my only concern would be that he wouldn't suffer discrimination through his life from bigots. Don't care a jot about no grandkids to besot me or a having a son-in-law married to my son. Either way I'd love him all the more for telling me.

SaraP


Joined: 30/04/2008
Posts: 295

Message Posted:
15/03/2009 00:33

Seaman..small community..must be over here! Do you know these people?



No harm done..one up the b-m...lol..up to the individual! Does not make them a bad person at all!







Anyone seen Captain Pugwash lately?

Hippo


Joined: 02/02/2007
Posts: 2070

Message Posted:
15/03/2009 06:07

I think now you can get an operation for it.

And while we on about this topic . What is this gay word that has slipped into the vocabulary, its homosexual or are people afraid of being called that?



Gay means happy n

TRNCVaughan


Joined: 27/04/2008
Posts: 4578

Message Posted:
15/03/2009 10:42

Being bisexual implies that he will have more than one partner from time to time or even at the same time, sometimes a woman sometimes a man. When he settles down will he have to choose one of them to the exclusion of the other? If not, why not? A heterosexual person is expected to restrict him/herself to sexual relations with one partner, as is, in theory, a homosexual person.

Of course in our PC world gays and bi's are given dispensation from normal morals. If my son said he was bisexual and my wife and I are supposed to accept that, why wouldn't my wife accept me saying I had decided I was not monogamous and wanted more than one partner?

Dusterbruce


Joined: 03/08/2007
Posts: 1125

Message Posted:
15/03/2009 12:03

TRNCVaughan, from what I see of the heterosexual world theres not much in the line of morals there either!



Hippo, the usage of the word gay for homosexuals came from an acronym of as Good As You!

Dusterbruce


Joined: 03/08/2007
Posts: 1125

Message Posted:
15/03/2009 12:44

Alf Simer



Are you saying that gay (and bisexual) people are inferior to 'straight' people?

karakum5c



Joined: 18/03/2008
Posts: 1021

Message Posted:
15/03/2009 13:08

There is nothing wrong about two women snogging

Dusterbruce


Joined: 03/08/2007
Posts: 1125

Message Posted:
15/03/2009 13:09

I have to say I am in agreement about all things sexual being 'in your face' all the time in the media. I find it embarrasing to see two people of any sexual orientation 'snogging' on mainstream television.



As for gay rights, gay people did not ask to be born gay (it is not a lifestyle 'choice') so have the right to be treated equally just like anyone else who was born 'different'.



You said in your earlier posting 'use the right tag' then added 'Queer', what tag would you use for someone born blind, or deaf, or disabled? What is 'Queer' about being a homosexual?

Dusterbruce


Joined: 03/08/2007
Posts: 1125

Message Posted:
15/03/2009 13:12

Karakum5c, why is this acceptable and not 2 blokes. neither is stereotypical 'normal'?

Dusterbruce


Joined: 03/08/2007
Posts: 1125

Message Posted:
15/03/2009 13:15

Its a free form of birth control!

Good job that gays exist or the world would be more overpopulated than it already is.



One thing I always liked about Northern Cyprus is that everyone was accepted equally no matter what their lifestyle. Shame if this has to change because of bigoted narrow-minded people.

Tiggy


Joined: 25/07/2007
Posts: 1994

Message Posted:
15/03/2009 13:31

Live and let live.



Is it is allowed in the Royal Navy ?

Macha


Joined: 18/01/2009
Posts: 650

Message Posted:
15/03/2009 17:39

alf simer: "We here a lot about '' Gay rights '' what about the rights of the rest of us to live life without seeing 2 blokes snoging of eastenders or 2 women at it on holloaks and emerdale."



Well, you could try substituting TV soap operas for something a little more educational and mind-broadening for starters...

Tiggy


Joined: 25/07/2007
Posts: 1994

Message Posted:
15/03/2009 19:10

Alf, looks like macha is trying to solicit you. (the dirty dog)



I suppose once you have been in the navy it is hard to drop the habit.



wonder if the misses knows he is bi.



not that I condem it.

clarets



Joined: 08/01/2009
Posts: 752

Message Posted:
16/03/2009 12:31

Msg 28....Paranoid....dont think Alf is saying that at all. What he says is happening and the Stalinist Beaurocrats in Westminster are now making it compulsory to teach VERY young children about it. This IS NOT A SUBJECT that should be touched upon until these young people have a CLEAR idea about sexuality.The PC MORONS of the far left are SO WRONG about all of this!

My 12 year old daughter came home from school,only the other day to hit me with the revelation that one of the 12 year old boys is Bisexual. I have seldom heard something as sickening as that.......the concept of sexuality at 12 should be anathema,but the concept of Bisexuality should not even enter their level of consciousness at that age. Such conceptualisation may indeed do massive harm, in that it may set them up for grooming and worse!

The-Wicks


Joined: 27/05/2007
Posts: 2279

Message Posted:
16/03/2009 12:40

clarets, message 39. A truer word was never spoken. I find it saddening, to say the least, that young children are being bombarded with information that, in my opinion, only serves to confuse. I read recently that children as young as 5 are being taught sex education in schools. I dread to think what the long-term effect of this may be. As you say, set them up for grooming and worse!!



Regards



J

Dusterbruce


Joined: 03/08/2007
Posts: 1125

Message Posted:
16/03/2009 14:59

I think the intention is to try to give them understanding and try to prevent them from becoming bigoted like the majority of their parents are!

Macha


Joined: 18/01/2009
Posts: 650

Message Posted:
16/03/2009 16:32

Dusterbrucer,



Precisely!

britvic



Joined: 05/09/2008
Posts: 3039

Message Posted:
16/03/2009 16:38

Do you love your child any less, because they are Gay, Bisexual? They are still your child regardless, as long as they are happy and healthy, a parent couldn't ask for more really.

No1Doyen


Joined: 04/07/2008
Posts: 16617

Message Posted:
16/03/2009 16:54

Exactly Nige. It's unconditional.

britvic



Joined: 05/09/2008
Posts: 3039

Message Posted:
16/03/2009 16:55

Alf, Being a sexual predator is far removed from being Homosexual, Bisexual or even Heterosexual for that matter!

britvic



Joined: 05/09/2008
Posts: 3039

Message Posted:
16/03/2009 16:59

................Nige?.........

Dusterbruce


Joined: 03/08/2007
Posts: 1125

Message Posted:
16/03/2009 17:30

Alf Simer



As usual bigoted unresearched bullshit!

96% of sexual activity with children is commited by trusted 'straight' relatives and family members, i.e. fathers/brothers/uncles

Dusterbruce


Joined: 03/08/2007
Posts: 1125

Message Posted:
16/03/2009 17:33

Alf Simer, you are 20 years out of date.

The majority of sexually transmitted disease including HIV is now spread by 'straight' men and women, and drug users!

Dusterbruce


Joined: 03/08/2007
Posts: 1125

Message Posted:
16/03/2009 17:40

Alf Simer



You are one huge bigot!



Do you know the reason that many gay men try to hide their homosexuality under the cloak of a normal marriage? Because bigoted people like you make them so frightened that they are different that they feel they have to conform and try to live a 'normal' life. The fact that it messes their brains up is irrelevant to people like you as long as they 'appear' to be normal. But eventually true feelings come out, hence they start to mess about with other men, the wives find out and think they are perverted. What is perverted is that a bigited society makes them try to live a false life in the first place.



Look among the Yahoo groups, there are thousands dedicated to married men who were forced into it by a bigoted ununderstanding 'normal' society and need an outlet for the sake of their sanity.

Dusterbruce


Joined: 03/08/2007
Posts: 1125

Message Posted:
16/03/2009 18:02

Gay establishments promote the message of protected sex to the extent of giving out free condoms.



If the heterosexual community is as responsible in promoting safer sex, then why are there so many teenage pregnancies?



In calling you a bigot, alf simer, I am not reverting to name calling, I am telling the truth!

Dusterbruce


Joined: 03/08/2007
Posts: 1125

Message Posted:
16/03/2009 18:17

Alt Simer

You have listed a number of medical conditions that are passed on by indulging in anal sex, and I have to agree that you are probably quite correct.

However, it is my understanding that many heterosexual couples indulge in this activity as well as gay/bisexual men.

Do you get my point? Or are you saying that it is only gay/bisexual men who pass on these diseases?



Also, it was you that started the name calling (Mssg 27)

Dusterbruce


Joined: 03/08/2007
Posts: 1125

Message Posted:
16/03/2009 18:19

Many bisexual/gay men may be predatory, but not against children.

clarets



Joined: 08/01/2009
Posts: 752

Message Posted:
16/03/2009 22:17

Dusterbruce msg 52....are the product of such a union? That is THE biggest load of merd I have heard in many a year ! utter nonsense.....where did you get that info ? Heterophobics Anonymous?

clarets



Joined: 08/01/2009
Posts: 752

Message Posted:
16/03/2009 22:26

Msg 61 Again....a total load of fanciful unsubstantiated bullsh****.

Lilli



Joined: 21/07/2008
Posts: 13081

Message Posted:
16/03/2009 22:47

I have worked with gay men most of my working life within the airlines and to be totally be really honest i could not worked with better people.I love them to bits all they gay people i know who had a relationship stayed in that relitionship and thats more than most heros do.They are born that way and seek out thier own. I wish them well they wont rape a woman or hurt any woman. please dont condone/ nige im sorry open your mind xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

clarets



Joined: 08/01/2009
Posts: 752

Message Posted:
16/03/2009 23:01

Lilli.....most women dont feel threatened by gay men(as you put it) and the reason for that is not rocket science!Quite a lot of heterosexual men do however fins overt gay behaviour offensive and possibly threatening,purely because of its overt nature,and its implications.I can certainly assure you that gay people are not saints any more than the rest of us............I thought this was about Bisexuals anyway!

croft



Joined: 09/02/2009
Posts: 65

Message Posted:
17/03/2009 03:18

I'm only a newbee here but it seems to me that at the start of this thread Segmen was asking for advice about 'devastated' mum and dad. Whatever the cause, I would think that none of us would like to think of our parents feeling 'devastated'. The question was about their turmoil, not the rights or wrongs of sexual orientation.



Segmen: I don't know the answer to your question, but knowing how most families are, there will be a reconciliation. My best guess is that the parents will go from shocked, to introspective, to accepting, to loving.

clarets



Joined: 08/01/2009
Posts: 752

Message Posted:
17/03/2009 03:41

that is the normal bereavement process,is it not?

stewy


Joined: 18/10/2008
Posts: 279

Message Posted:
17/03/2009 05:10

Castration is the only way to go.

segmen


Joined: 05/12/2008
Posts: 120

Message Posted:
22/03/2009 17:28

I JUST WANTED TO THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR TIME AND EFFORT...

IT HAS BEEN A GREAT HELP...

SEGMEN

No1Doyen


Joined: 04/07/2008
Posts: 16617

Message Posted:
23/03/2009 12:43

Segmen. You stated in your first post that the parents were getting help. How are they getting on now with the help they have received? Are they beginning to accept the situation?

redtom


Joined: 30/12/2008
Posts: 116

Message Posted:
23/03/2009 22:59

Segmen good post some good replys. But some biggoted points of view. I personaly dont understand Homosexuality or Bisexualty I to have some great friends who are the above but as i said i dont understand it ! My father used to say to me about depraved sex ! That if you mauled in sh--t you would catch a desease. Tommy

segmen


Joined: 05/12/2008
Posts: 120

Message Posted:
25/03/2009 10:48

ANOTHER BAD NEWS!!!

Mum and dad of this boy are getting divorced!!!!!

Mum found out that boys mum been chatting and meeting with bisexsuals!!

How can we save this marriage?

Do you think that husband should be panished?

She wants all the wealth from him otherwise she is treatining him to reveal everything in Court.Can she that?Is he not a human?He apologized deeply and regrets all the way but I feel he should not be panished this way..

I am waiting for your coments please.....THANK YOU IN ADVANCE..

croft



Joined: 09/02/2009
Posts: 65

Message Posted:
26/03/2009 03:12

Segmen: I strongly suspect that this entire thread has been started by you in order to provoke controversy.



Certainly, giving it the title: 'Hi mum and dad I am bisexual!!!' smacks of tabloid newspaper-style hype.



Your last post reads suspiciously like an attempt to write a new episode of a soap. (Plus, you never say what your part is in this story.)



Now, I'm only a new boy round here, so it may be that other forum members know who you are. Sorry if I'm wrong but I think your wasting people's time.

Hippo


Joined: 02/02/2007
Posts: 2070

Message Posted:
26/03/2009 04:40

Segman-what a load of absaloute bullshit you spout

jimjam


Joined: 23/03/2009
Posts: 5

Message Posted:
26/03/2009 06:46

I for one do not believe that an orientation of sex is anyones business but one's own! I do not think it should be either advertised nor denied, and it should definately not be a topic of discusion upon meeting someone for the first time. I might point out that although i am not homosexual, my son is, and may i also say that he is the most amazing son anyone could ever wish for!! He is kind, diplomatic and sensitive, and is loved by many people...I consider myself a VERY lucky man to have spawned such beauty!!



JJ