Excuse's

pollytat


Joined: 15/12/2007
Posts: 87

Message Posted:
04/03/2008 21:42

I am not asleep just inspecting the backs of my eyelids.

Polly

Gooses


Joined: 16/07/2007
Posts: 60

Message Posted:
04/03/2008 23:03

I am not over weight - I am under tall

orangekazzie



Joined: 31/07/2007
Posts: 1091

Message Posted:
04/03/2008 23:06

I'm not short, my eyes are too near the ground.

Nglbarnes



Joined: 08/02/2008
Posts: 89

Message Posted:
05/03/2008 02:19

I am not overweight, I just suffer from dwarfism, for my weight I should be 9ft 4inches tall!

elko2



Joined: 24/07/2007
Posts: 4400

Message Posted:
05/03/2008 08:53

Despite what my wife says I am not spending too much time on the internet but how can I ignore so many quesions? That is my excuse.

ismet

TimothyCadman


Joined: 13/12/2007
Posts: 1040

Message Posted:
05/03/2008 17:08

My alarm clock didn't wake me this morning. The dog decided to have a lie in.

TimothyCadman


Joined: 13/12/2007
Posts: 1040

Message Posted:
05/03/2008 17:10

My bus didn't run this morning as my dad wasn't feeling to well after coming home drunk last night.

jock1



Joined: 06/01/2008
Posts: 3786

Message Posted:
06/03/2008 12:18

Im not short just 3ft 12"

Graham


Joined: 20/10/2007
Posts: 397

Message Posted:
06/03/2008 12:31

Dust is God's protective cover for furniture.



Graham

pollytat


Joined: 15/12/2007
Posts: 87

Message Posted:
06/03/2008 12:36

It was not me it was the guy that just left the building. Said his name was Elvis.

TimothyCadman


Joined: 13/12/2007
Posts: 1040

Message Posted:
06/03/2008 13:19

For more, in a similar vain, then visit:



http://www.bbc.co.uk/stoke/fun/excuses/index.shtml



Or to keep you going, here are 10 more courtesy of



http://www.careerbuilder.com/JobSeeker/careerbytes/CBArticle.aspx?articleID=691&cbRecursionCnt=1&cbsid=7b5b50308d4945358a88aaa461a4a5b0-258099234-JE-5



1. Someone was following me, and I drove all around town trying to lose them.

2. My dog dialed 911, and the police wanted to question me about what "really" happened.

3. My girlfriend got mad and destroyed all of my undergarments.

4. I woke up and thought I was temporarily deaf.

5. I just wasn't "feelin' it" this morning.

6. I was up all night arguing with God.

7. A raccoon stole my work shoe off my porch.

8. I super-glued my eye thinking it was contact solution.

9. I was putting lotion on my face when my finger went up my nose causing a nose bleed.

10. A prostitute climbed into my car at a stop light, and I was afraid my wife would see her and think I was messing around... so I got out of the car.

lesleyd



Joined: 05/06/2007
Posts: 265

Message Posted:
06/03/2008 17:00

Sick Notes

These are real notes written by parents in a Tennessee school district...(spellings have been left intact.)



1. My son is under a doctor's care and should not take PE today. Please execute him.



2. Please exkuce lisa for being absent she was sick and i had her shot.



3. Dear school: please ecsc's john being absent on jan. 28, 29, 30, 31, 32 and also 33.



4. Please excuse gloria from jim today. She is administrating.



5. Please excuse roland from p.e. for a few days. Yesterday he fell out of a tree and misplaced his hip.



6. John has been absent because he had two teeth taken out of his face.



7. Carlos was absent yesterday because he was playing football. He was hurt in the growing part.



8. Megan could not come to school today because she has been bothered by very close veins.



9. Chris will not be in school cus he has an acre in his side.



10. Please excuse ray friday from school. He has very loose vowels.



11. Please excuse pedro from being absent yesterday. He had (diahre, dyrea, direathe), the sh**s. [note: words in ( )'s were crossed out] .



12. Please excuse tommy for being absent yesterday. He had diarrhea, and his boots leak.



13. Irving was absent yesterday because he missed his bust.



14. Please excuse jimmy for being.It was his father's fault.



15. I kept billie home because she had to go christmas shopping because i don't know what size she wear.



16. Please excuse jennifer fo! R missing school yesterday. We

forgot to get the sunday paper off the porch, and when we found it monday. We thought it was sunday.



17. Sally won't be in school a week from friday. We have to attend her funeral.



18. My daughter was absent yesterday because she was tired. She spent a weekend with the marines.



19. Ple ase excuse jason for being absent yesterday. He had a cold and could not breed well.



20. Please excuse mary for being absent yesterday. She was in bed with gramps.



21. Gloria was absent yesterday as she was having a gangover.



22. Please excuse brenda. She has been sick and under the doctor.



23. Maryann was absent december 11-16, because she had a fever,sore throat, headache and upset stomach. Her sister was also sick,fever an sore throat, her brother had a low grade fever and ached all over. I wasn't the best either, sore throat and fever. There must be something going around, her father even got hot last night.



Lesleyd

pilgrim



Joined: 11/05/2007
Posts: 1404

Message Posted:
06/03/2008 20:18

its the invisible man, tell him I can't see him.