Best divorce joke ever

Jimmyboy63


Joined: 16/03/2009
Posts: 400

Message Posted:
18/11/2009 15:06

hope this makes you smile













> Dear Wife:

>

>

> I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you forever.

> I've been a good man to you for 7 years & I have nothing to show for it.

>

> These last 2 weeks have been hell.

>

> Your boss called to tell me that you quit your job today & that was the last straw.

>

> Last week, you came home & didn't even notice I had a new haircut, had cooked your favorite meal & even wore a brand new pair of silk b o x e r s. You ate in 2 minutes, & went straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don't tell me you love me anymore; you don't want s e x or anything that connects us as husband & wife.

>

> Either you're cheating on me or you don't love me anymore; whatever the case, I'm gone.

>

> Your EX-Husband

>

> P.S don't try to find me.

>

> Your SISTER & I are moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!

>

> -----------------------------------------------------

daisy dukes


Joined: 06/09/2008
Posts: 3815

Message Posted:
18/11/2009 15:14

erm.....and the punchline is.........?





DD

DutchCrusader



Joined: 19/05/2008
Posts: 11281

Message Posted:
18/11/2009 15:16

This one is at least as funny and even more complete... | http://is.gd/4XVVi |

daisy dukes


Joined: 06/09/2008
Posts: 3815

Message Posted:
18/11/2009 15:18

aaaah, much better...thanks Hans





DD

smithy


Joined: 17/07/2008
Posts: 5301

Message Posted:
18/11/2009 15:19

hans a great joke and what an ending )

Jimmyboy63


Joined: 16/03/2009
Posts: 400

Message Posted:
18/11/2009 15:20

ear Ex-Husband:

>

> Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter.

>

> It's true you & I have been married for 7 years, although a good man is a far cry from what you've been. I watch my soaps so much because they drown out your constant whining & griping. Too bad that doesn't work. I DID notice when you got a hair cut last week, but the 1st thing that came to mind was 'You look just like a girl!' Since my mother raised me not to say anything if you can't say something nice, I didn't comment.

>

> When you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY SISTER, because I stopped eating pork 7 years ago. About those new silk boxers: I turned away from you because the $49.99 price tag was still on them, & I prayed it was a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed $50 from me that morning. After all of this, I still loved you & felt we could work it out.

>

> So when I hit the lotto for 10 million dollars, I quit my job &

> bought us 2 tic

Jimmyboy63


Joined: 16/03/2009
Posts: 400

Message Posted:
18/11/2009 15:21

2 tickets to Jamaica , but when I got home you were gone. Everything happens for a reason, I guess. I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said that the letter you wrote ensures you won't get a dime from me. So take care.

>

> Your Ex-Wife, Rich as Hell & Free!

>

> P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this, but my sister Carla was born Carl.

>

> I hope that's not a problem.