[joke] - blame my wife !

mmmmmm



Joined: 19/12/2008
Posts: 8398

Message Posted:
09/02/2010 18:20

A rich Russian Oligarch has fallen in love with a woman who constantly rebuffs his romantic advances



He has wined her, dined her, offered her gifts of expensive French perfume, and diamond rings, but she still politely refuses his amorous advances..



Finally one day she says, "I believe you are serious and will permit you to kiss me in two places"



"My beloved one", he says, hardly able to contain his excitement, "may I ask WHERE I am permitted to kiss you"?

























"Of course, my Dear", and whispers in his ear....



































































"Monaco or Costa Smeralda to start.. and we will see how far I will let you go"...

No1Doyen


Joined: 04/07/2008
Posts: 16617

Message Posted:
09/02/2010 18:29

Mark.... ) ) )

racoonchic



Joined: 17/11/2008
Posts: 3223

Message Posted:
09/02/2010 19:34

sorry call me thick but wtf

erolz


Joined: 17/11/2008
Posts: 3456

Message Posted:
09/02/2010 19:38

Disecting jokes is a bit like disecting frogs, both die in the process.



Anyway the 'joke' is you are supposed to think that the kiss location is on a part of the womans body, but it turns out to be a geographical location instead - thats the joke.



Like I say - great way to kill a joke (or a frog).

Tiggy


Joined: 25/07/2007
Posts: 1994

Message Posted:
09/02/2010 23:42

That's a Cracker! = null points.



try it like this..............A rich Irish Oligarch has fallen in love...........

You will have them laughing in the Aisles!!

mmmmmm



Joined: 19/12/2008
Posts: 8398

Message Posted:
10/02/2010 00:07

Well it sounded really good when Wifey told it ! ;)

Lilli



Joined: 21/07/2008
Posts: 13081

Message Posted:
10/02/2010 00:13

well i liked it mark it appealed to my soh xxx

Tiggy


Joined: 25/07/2007
Posts: 1994

Message Posted:
10/02/2010 00:23

Only pulling your leg Mark!



but don't give up the day job just yet!

elko2



Joined: 24/07/2007
Posts: 4400

Message Posted:
10/02/2010 01:06

I liked it.

ismet

Lemtich



Joined: 15/02/2007
Posts: 1487

Message Posted:
10/02/2010 01:50

Mark



I know how to spoil a woman!

















































I've ruined loads of them!



Lem

No1Doyen


Joined: 04/07/2008
Posts: 16617

Message Posted:
10/02/2010 10:31

) ) )

moonstone


Joined: 27/08/2009
Posts: 158

Message Posted:
10/02/2010 11:22

hahaha lemtichs joke is better!

Enrico


Joined: 07/12/2008
Posts: 209

Message Posted:
10/02/2010 14:43

Try this one.



LUBRICATION



Paddy was present when his wife was giving birth.

The doctor said "Here it comes, it's a boy.

"Thats splendid " says Paddy.

The doctor says "Wait, there is another, its a girl".

"Thats splendid "says Paddy.

The doctor says "There is another, it's another boy".

"That's splendid" said Paddy.

Paddy asked the doctor "What caused us to have 3 babies"?

"It must have happened during conception", replies the doctor.

Later at home Paddy says " Do you remember nine months ago when we ran out of Vaseline and we used 3 in 1 oil instead"?







Yes said his wife, " It's a good job we didn't use WD 40".

mmmmmm



Joined: 19/12/2008
Posts: 8398

Message Posted:
10/02/2010 21:16

Dear Moonstone

re msg - 12



But I don't 'fancy' Lem ;)



re msg 10 - Lem



Hi mate !



I haven't welcomed you 'back' as I was 'away' at the time of your return !!



Got to see you posting..



I took the Mrs to see the IoW back in in August.. for 1 night ! .. she loved it...



Whilst in Cowes she tried to sink the new Queen Mary .. she missed ;)



http://www.flickr.com/photos/veta_mark/3876949495/in/photostream/

mmmmmm



Joined: 19/12/2008
Posts: 8398

Message Posted:
10/02/2010 21:16

re 13



))

mmmmmm



Joined: 19/12/2008
Posts: 8398

Message Posted:
11/02/2010 07:51

re msg 16



GOOD to see you posting again...!