Joke: For all Yorkies

TopTen


Joined: 15/04/2009
Posts: 1246

Message Posted:
19/02/2010 11:25

Yorkshire man takes his cat to the vet.

Yorkshireman: "Ayup, lad, I need to talk to thee about me cat."

Vet: "Is it a tom?"

Yorkshireman: "Nay, I've browt it with us."



A Yorkshireman's dog dies and as it was a favourite pet he decides to have a gold statue made by a jeweller to remember the dog by.

Yorkshireman: "Can tha mek us a gold statue of yon dog?"

Jeweller: "Do you want it 18 carat?"

Yorkshireman: "No I want it chewin' a bone yer daft bugger!"



Bloke from Barnsley with a sore arsehole asks chemist "Nah then lad, does tha sell arse cream?"

Chemist replies "Aye, magnum or cornetto?"

greylag


Joined: 08/04/2009
Posts: 1110

Message Posted:
19/02/2010 12:12

Spot on top ten,

Grey.

nurseawful



Joined: 06/02/2009
Posts: 5934

Message Posted:
20/02/2010 06:33

Top ten



And you profess not to understand me!!!!

cyprusgiant


Joined: 08/07/2009
Posts: 467

Message Posted:
20/02/2010 12:28

Just sounds like me & Mike on the radio!

Blackie


Joined: 20/12/2007
Posts: 129

Message Posted:
20/02/2010 14:11

I went to the doctor recently and I told him that I was miserable and depressed. He advised me to take a holiday in Yorkshire. I asked him if it would cure me. He said no but at least I would fit in.

No1Doyen


Joined: 04/07/2008
Posts: 16617

Message Posted:
20/02/2010 14:25

A Yorkshiremans' wife dies and the widower decides that her headstone should have the words "she were thine" engraved on it. He calls the stone mason, who assures him that the headstone will be ready a few days after the funeral. True to his word the stone mason calls the widower to say that the headstone is ready and would he like to come and have a look. When the widower gets there he takes one look at the stone to see that it's been engraved "she were thin". He explodes - fooking 'ell man, you've left the fooking "e" out, you've left the fooking "e" out. The stone mason apologises and assures the poor widower that it will be rectified the following morning. Next day comes and the widower returns to the stone mason - "there you go sir, I've put the "e" on the stone for you".

No1Doyen


Joined: 04/07/2008
Posts: 16617

Message Posted:
20/02/2010 14:27

The widower then looks on the stone and reads out - "e she were thin"