Worst chat up lines ...ever!

No1Doyen


Joined: 04/07/2008
Posts: 16617

Message Posted:
21/05/2010 21:40

Are these the worst chat up lines ever?



I seemed to of lost my number, any chance i could have yours?

Do you believe in love at first sight? or do you think i should walk past again?

I bet your last name must be Jacobs? because I think your a real cracker.

Are you a parking ticket? because you have fine written all over you!

Your name must be Gillette? the best a man can get.

If I could arrange the alphabet I'll put U and I together.

Pick a number between 1 n 10 (3) sorry you lost, you'll have to take off all your clothes.

If you were my homework I'd be doing you rite now all over my desk!

No1Doyen


Joined: 04/07/2008
Posts: 16617

Message Posted:
21/05/2010 21:41

Hi I was just curious cuz I saw you noticing me so I'm just given you a notice that I noticed you after you noticed me.

If kisses were snowflakes, I'd send you a blizzard.

Do you like raisins? well how about a date then?

I may not be Fred Flintstone but I know i could make your BedRock.

Are those trousers made out of Space Shuttle tiles because your ass is out of this world!

Is their an airport around here? because my heart is taking off.

Excuse me do you know how much a polar bear weighs? NO! Answer Me Neith er but it breaks the ice.

GRAB YOUR COAT, YOU HAVE PULLED

If you were a lolly I would be licking you all night!

No1Doyen


Joined: 04/07/2008
Posts: 16617

Message Posted:
21/05/2010 21:43

Here's 10p ring home and tell your mum that you wont be coming home tonight!

I'm new in town, can you give me directions to your flat?

Your daddy must have been a hunter because you're a fox!

Hey, is your dad a terrorist? Cos baby, you're the bomb!

Do you want to go and do what I'm going to tell my mates we did anyway?

I looked up sexy in the dictionary today and your name was listed

I lost my phone number, can I have yours?

Is it hot in here or is it you?

Brinsley


Joined: 04/04/2009
Posts: 6858

Message Posted:
21/05/2010 21:47

Come on Bill, the ultimate!

(rude) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KBq5Qo2QhTI



Richard

nurseawful



Joined: 06/02/2009
Posts: 5934

Message Posted:
21/05/2010 21:49

True story.



Hubby's first words to me were "What's the talent like in this town"



Never been so insulted in my life swore he would never find out and that was in 1971, by the gods he has paid for it since!!! But he loves me really I think.mm



Chris

Blackbird



Joined: 11/08/2009
Posts: 1432

Message Posted:
21/05/2010 22:29

Yea Brinsley...the ultimate....Excellent....

Groucho



Joined: 26/04/2008
Posts: 7993

Message Posted:
21/05/2010 22:46

I know someone who tried this on a woman "Your dress would look great on my bedroom floor..."

No1Doyen


Joined: 04/07/2008
Posts: 16617

Message Posted:
21/05/2010 22:47

Gavin. Does he post on here? )

Brinsley


Joined: 04/04/2009
Posts: 6858

Message Posted:
21/05/2010 22:52

Bill

Good see you back in men's clothing!



Richard

No1Doyen


Joined: 04/07/2008
Posts: 16617

Message Posted:
21/05/2010 22:54

Richard. Are you taking private lessons from Cooper? )

Lilli



Joined: 21/07/2008
Posts: 13081

Message Posted:
21/05/2010 23:42

you forgot is that a gun in your pocket or are you so pleased to see me. years ago when i was flying the classic was im mandy fly me , im randy try me/ god so tacky xx

Sal1262



Joined: 03/05/2010
Posts: 174

Message Posted:
22/05/2010 01:46

You dont sweat much for a fat lass

Groucho



Joined: 26/04/2008
Posts: 7993

Message Posted:
22/05/2010 06:40

Bill "Gavin. Does he post on here?"



Nope, thank God!

keithcaley



Joined: 13/06/2008
Posts: 2521

Message Posted:
22/05/2010 09:01

Do you want a XXXX?

No?

Well would you mind lying down while I have one?



Also, with acknowledgements to 'Roy' in Rugby, whose warped mind came up with them -

Do you like Chicken?

Well cop hold of this, it's FOWL!



and, in a similar vein...



Do you like Beef?

Well try this, it's DRIPPING!

Tenakoutou



Joined: 27/07/2009
Posts: 4110

Message Posted:
22/05/2010 09:42

'Your place, or mine? - If yer gonna argue about it, we'd better call the whole thing off!'

magicart


Joined: 05/10/2008
Posts: 985

Message Posted:
22/05/2010 11:18

How do you like your eggs in the morning-fertilised?

deputydawg


Joined: 30/03/2010
Posts: 1727

Message Posted:
22/05/2010 13:19

Warning. Tried these and still years later have blurred vision having been battered. Hello sweetheart "do you know the difference between mad passionate love and a cheese sandwich?" "No" "In that case I will treat you to lunch" !



Hello sweetheart "Do you know the difference between rampant sex and a secret?" "No" "Then lay down I badly need to whisper you something" !



Why do you keep calling me "Spanner" when I have only just met you ? "Because when I look at you my nuts tighten up" !

loslobos


Joined: 02/04/2009
Posts: 167

Message Posted:
22/05/2010 18:52

I've tried this one and it sometimes work depending on the classs oflady, "Hey darlin do you like Roast Beef ? Yes, good, cause grab hold of this it's drippin !!