why are we happy here? and why we are not ? i would like to know

kimosh


Joined: 09/08/2008
Posts: 193

Message Posted:
25/09/2008 17:10

if there is honest people on here for whatever reason what makes ya happy here ..... and for whatever reason why wouldnt you be happy here ?

kimosh


Joined: 09/08/2008
Posts: 193

Message Posted:
25/09/2008 17:14

im sure im not the only negative person who is honest on here

joandjelly


Joined: 24/02/2008
Posts: 2953

Message Posted:
25/09/2008 17:21

I have been coming here for the past 12 years and have lived here permanently for 18 months and love it. Wonderful scenery, weather and food. I have great TC and expat friends and a great social life. I'm 41 years old and I don't have to work. Every day that I look at the mountains it makes me happy. I have a lovely dog (couldn't have one in the UK working full time) and he makes me happy.



I think the people that are not happy here are those that came here purely for financial reasons (e.g. cheap villas). People who cannot live without a roast dinner on a Sunday or Eastenders on the telly. There is nothing wrong with this but if it is a UK lifestyle that you want then you will only really be happy in the UK.



If you cannot understand that this country has been under embargoes for 34 years and make allowances for the reality of what that means then this is not the place for you.



I am unhappy that we are still on builders electric but it's not the end of the world and the positives far outweigh any negatives.



By the way the above is just my personal opinion and I'm not directing any of the above comments at anybody personally, just making observations.

Coachie



Joined: 29/07/2008
Posts: 2135

Message Posted:
25/09/2008 17:22

Kimosh..I am happy on here because of the nice people you can converse with about mumerous things.,and on the whole get jovial and sensible replies.

As for the "why wouldnt I be happy on here" it would because we have the odd would be "wassick" and "barrack room lawyer" who seem intent on spoiling everyone elses pleasure.I will no doubt get some caustic replies to my statement..Watch this space Kimosh and you probably see what I mean..

ilovecyprus


Joined: 08/05/2007
Posts: 2880

Message Posted:
25/09/2008 17:30

kimosh



Are you tied in to the TRNC and have no way out?

ilovecyprus


Joined: 08/05/2007
Posts: 2880

Message Posted:
25/09/2008 17:33

enjoyed your post joandjelly

Littlenige



Joined: 24/12/2006
Posts: 3594

Message Posted:
25/09/2008 17:38

I can not believe i have to agree with joandjelly 100 %



everyday i look at themontains and see somthing different. 4 years on and still on builders electric !!! grrrrr



And 48 not 41 but hey I do look younger. lol



joandjelly nice post.

bobby


Joined: 03/07/2008
Posts: 8

Message Posted:
25/09/2008 17:39

Wake up in the morning and look out the window, that's happiness for me!

No1Doyen


Joined: 04/07/2008
Posts: 16617

Message Posted:
25/09/2008 17:41

kimosh. When you say, what makes you happy here, are you referring to this BB or the trnc?

kimosh


Joined: 09/08/2008
Posts: 193

Message Posted:
25/09/2008 17:42

yes im tied to trnc (ilovecyprus) with no way out .... i came to this island ready for everything i thought .... in my dreams ........... everything i have done here i have been ripped off ....omg im not saying this has only happened to me ...i came here with enough money to retire as i thought ....what a wake up call ... i dont blame no one ..... im just saying i know a few people in very same situation as myself .... but if i wasnt in this situation i would be at home .... i am a little bitter as i feel if i was a guy maybe this wouldnt be happening ....then again it may ...... there is no way im putting a down side on cyprus ....cos im sure .... there must be some good things lol .... im not in a postion where i cannot go home i just want to sell up before i leave ....as i would never return not even if i was paid to ........ what a mess ay to end up in

ilovecyprus


Joined: 08/05/2007
Posts: 2880

Message Posted:
25/09/2008 17:44

I am sorry to hear about your situation kimosh. Sounds like you are having a hard time :-(

kimosh


Joined: 09/08/2008
Posts: 193

Message Posted:
25/09/2008 17:48

no i hate tv so no and i have all the channels . i dont miss eastenders as one as asked ..... god i had all the other things in the uk and a life ...guess most have come here as couples ...so ya wouldnt notice any differents as you have someone to share this with .... as a woman where would ya go alone here ... think about it .... no where its a mans world .... so is this forum for people who only like cyprus lol mmmmmmmmm guess so ...what a place to hang out then ay cos most are on here everyday says a lot for the island ay

Wilts Girl


Joined: 16/07/2008
Posts: 159

Message Posted:
25/09/2008 17:53

Kimosh, you've got my curiosity up now. What can possibly have happened to you to make you want to come back to England? Having been back in England for 2 weeks, all I can think of is my next trip to NC!



I just wish I could make the move and live out there permanently!

ilovecyprus


Joined: 08/05/2007
Posts: 2880

Message Posted:
25/09/2008 17:53

so you are seeking some girl friends to support you?

No1Doyen


Joined: 04/07/2008
Posts: 16617

Message Posted:
25/09/2008 17:57

Kimosh - why don't you join a gym. You'll meet new friends and it'll give you something to do.

kimosh


Joined: 09/08/2008
Posts: 193

Message Posted:
25/09/2008 17:58

hahahahahaha tryed that one (ilovecyprus) ..... im retiring for the day i think this site is for some who think the island is a magical dream ..... hey if i was in the uk ...... i wouldnt be in this mess ...no good talking to strangers is it ...take care

ilovecyprus


Joined: 08/05/2007
Posts: 2880

Message Posted:
25/09/2008 18:00

good luck kimosh

Littlenige



Joined: 24/12/2006
Posts: 3594

Message Posted:
25/09/2008 18:01

think this site is for some who think the island is a magical dream



Many things it might be magical dream it is not. beurocratic nightmare may be nearer to the truth.

joandjelly


Joined: 24/02/2008
Posts: 2953

Message Posted:
25/09/2008 18:02

Maybe that's the problem kimosh. If you come here alone then you have to talk to strangers to have a life here. What would you be doing if you were in the UK?

Wilts Girl


Joined: 16/07/2008
Posts: 159

Message Posted:
25/09/2008 18:03

Kimosh, while I am sympathetic to your situation I would wonder why you chose Northern Cyprus to move to permanently? Of course there are those on here who think Northern Cyprus is wonderful and they have probably made the right choice moving there.



I am assuming you weren’t forced to move out there so I was just wondering why you chose it in the first place?



And your wrong about it being no good talking to strangers, sometimes you can share more with them than you can those that know you.



Good luck and I hope things pick up for you.

ilovecyprus


Joined: 08/05/2007
Posts: 2880

Message Posted:
25/09/2008 18:05

good last point wilts girl

No1Doyen


Joined: 04/07/2008
Posts: 16617

Message Posted:
25/09/2008 18:13

Agree. Good Post Wilts Girl

kimosh


Joined: 09/08/2008
Posts: 193

Message Posted:
25/09/2008 20:21

thanks (ilovecyprus)

kimosh


Joined: 09/08/2008
Posts: 193

Message Posted:
25/09/2008 20:34

wilts girl ...... thank you for answering my post ....well i have 3 children all of whom wished to move here .... and said and promised me life would be better ... god i had my doubts before i come here .... as i have said a holiday is very different from living the dream .... where would anyone go ...in my position ... divorced.... my choice .... with 3 children who loved it here .... mmmmmmm ...a bad mum would have said you go ..... i had a life in the uk a few nice friends ..... and i lived buy the sea ....now i live on a rock with no morals oh yes there are some .... until its your turn ... god forbid..... no shops or shopping .... food well pass ... sea and beaches if ya wanna pay for that service ..... everyone on here is leaving in dream here ..... i guess paying for what should be free is a service is it .... know one on here will ever wake up untill they have been ripped of left right and centre ....... omg im not proud of being a brit to be honest .... cos know one is honest

Groucho



Joined: 26/04/2008
Posts: 7993

Message Posted:
25/09/2008 20:39

I wrote this on a similar thread in "another place"...



It is still true today...



We love it here...



Reasons:-



1. We have time for our children



2. Our children have time for us.... in the UK we were all tired, frantic and under pressure.



3. The pace of life is conducive to a relaxed temperament (if you can handle the slow lane - it drives some folk bananas)



4. The unregulated nature of most things (we are not trying to work here - if we were, this would probably drive us bananas)



5. The local people (some ex-pats don't seem to want to get on with the locals - they think it best to shout at them in English and tell them how they'd never get away with "it" in the UK, shocking but all too often true - you are guests here, behave respectfully)



6. The weather (if you can't stand the heat yada yada yada.... or go away from June to September).



7. The island views - mountains behind, sea in front - what could be better (as long as no one builds and blocks it off)



8. The other people we meet who have can-do approach to all things Cypriot, we try to avoid the "little Englanders" like the plague if we can, they are an embarrassment to us and the UK. See item 5.



9. The language, we've been having lessons once a week for three or more years and still enjoy coming to grips with the language both spoken and written... It gives you an in-built advantage when dealing with Turkish speakers... they really do appreciate it when you make the effort, see item 5.



10. The health service - now you probably won't believe this but everyone we've heard of who has needed treatment, has got primary health care at the point of need. They also have praised the level of care taken, low costs and quality of the treatment. In the UK most of them would have been put on a NHS waiting list to see a specialist and then been bounced several times because the specialist is seeing private patients in a BUPA hospital.....



update....



Recognise the things you can change and do something about it... don't kill yourself worrying about the things you can't influence... it's only yourself you are harming...

kimosh


Joined: 09/08/2008
Posts: 193

Message Posted:
25/09/2008 20:45

nice message groucho...... thanks nothing will change the way i feel

Wilts Girl


Joined: 16/07/2008
Posts: 159

Message Posted:
26/09/2008 11:34

Kimosh, how old are your children (if you dont mind me asking)?



I am 23 and love my mum dearly and would want her to be happy, maybe your children would prefer you to be happy and move back home? Then you can have the lovely holidays you want to come and see them without having to live there full time?

No1Doyen


Joined: 04/07/2008
Posts: 16617

Message Posted:
26/09/2008 11:46

know one on here will ever wake up untill they have been ripped of left right and centre ....... omg im not proud of being a brit to be honest .... cos know one is honest



kimosh, what do you mean by no one is honest?

ilovecyprus


Joined: 08/05/2007
Posts: 2880

Message Posted:
26/09/2008 12:08

Hi kimosh



I can hear that you are having a had time. You are feeling bad and put upon. The trouble is that this can become a comfortable feeling for you, one that is familiar.



If you are going to pull yourself through this then you are going to have to face up to the situation and take some action. You will either have to adapt to your environment and see the positives around you or you have to come back to the UK. Seeing only the negatives around you is going to only make you unhappy.

The trouble is that when we are negative people dont want to be around us. They dont want to be contaminated. It's a shame because that is one needs the help the most



My advice is to seek some help to get you through this.

stellasstar1



Joined: 02/07/2008
Posts: 1519

Message Posted:
26/09/2008 12:13

One of the big problems and frustrations, many people seem to have here is with getting "things" done, be it household repairs, building, gardening, electrics etc. I would just like to say that it isn't only the English that have this problem, the Cypriots haven't all ganged up against us, as they have the same problems.

My partner is Cypriot, a painter and decorator, and sometimes he has to employ other people to help him complete a job, i.e tiler, or electrician etc. and it drives him mad about how unreliable workers are, and a lot of these people are his friends!, but still they let him down, by not turning up when they say, arriving late, coming one day and not the next. He is trying single handed to re-educate the workers to be reliable, do what they say in the correct time, and clean up after themselves. He has lived in Australia, so understand the different way of working, but he says it will come here, we just have to be patient. Yavas, yavas.

No1Doyen


Joined: 04/07/2008
Posts: 16617

Message Posted:
26/09/2008 12:13

kimosh. What Mark has said is true. Heres an article that may help you.



We all develop certain patterns and beliefs in our life that aren't very useful for us. It's part of the process of growing up. We hear, we see, and we are told sometimes very firmly just how it is and what we are supposed to think and feel. We become very comfortable with those beliefs and we rarely challenge ourselves to break out of them. But when we are so accustomed to feeling negative about life or people, we are truly dealing with a comfort issue that is holding us back from fully realizing our potential.



Some of us had great childhoods and others of us had absolutely messed up childhoods. In fact, some of us experienced some pretty horrific childhoods. As boys we grew into men and we were told to put it away, pretend it never happened, and move on. We stuffed it and sucked it and now we are unhappy people moving about in a world that feels foreign to us. The good news in all this unhappy bull is that we now are grown men and we have the ultimate power of choice.



Think about some of the nonsense you were told as a child. Most of heard about how boys don't cry unless they are sissies. First of all, what is a sissy? By our fathers' definition, a metrosexual man would look like a sissy. Is he? Of course not. In fact, he's getting laid a lot more than you and I because he is in touch with who he is and what women want while you and I have spent how long hanging out behind the scenes trying to be "real men." Did you ever cry in front of a woman? Most women respond to a man's tears as though he is the most incredible little creature on earth, and he hasn't been shunned or out casted because of a few tears. Did you ever wonder why we worked so hard to please an enigmatic society that has defined what and who we are supposed to be?



Being a man doesn't have to be all that complicated. We don't have to wander around in our security blanket of negative feelings in order to be a real man. In fact, we are pretty much on the road to liberation and each and every one of has the power to become that liberated man. You don't have to feel bad in order to get what you want.



Take work for example. If you want to achieve more in your career is it really necessary to decide that you are going to be miserable working where you are right now in order to make sure that you are able to go farther in the future? Why make ourselves so uncomfortable right now for something we want down the road. We're missing it. Can we not be happy and satisfied men and still aspire to go farther and harder in our careers? Of course we can. We just aren't really aware of this. We use our cloak of negative feelings to prevent ourselves from feeling negative later. That's a truly interesting concept and yet almost every single one of us has done it or is still doing it.



The same basic idea applies to women. We believe we have to be unhappy about the situation in order to change it. If we want to find a great woman, we don't have to be unhappy about being alone to do so. If we aren't feeling like we deserve a good woman, then we are obviously out there fishing with the wrong bait. What we truly believe and how we feel about ourselves and the world can be incredibly transparent to the majority of women.



There is absolutely nothing wrong with feeling good about who you are, feeling good about your situation, and working diligently to improve it. There is nothing wrong with recognizing that you aren't perfect in every single way and yet still be perfectly suited to meeting a fantastic woman.



This cloak of negative security blanket that we love so much is also a perfect form of self sabotage. When we do have a fantastic woman at our side, we are perfect gentlemen when it comes to convincing ourselves we aren't going to be able to hang onto her or that sooner or later she wil

Chessman


Joined: 13/05/2008
Posts: 486

Message Posted:
26/09/2008 12:28

Kimosh. This helps me, I hope it helps you



Go placidly amid the noise and haste,

and remember what peace there may be in silence.

As far as possible, without surrender, be on good terms with all persons.

Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others,

even to the dull and ignorant; they too have their story.

Avoid loud and aggressive persons; they are vexations to the spirit.

If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain or bitter,

for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.

Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.

Keep interested in your own career, however humble,

it’s a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.

Exercise caution in your business affairs, for the world is full of trickery.

But let this not blind you to what virtue there is;

many persons strive for high ideals, and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself.

Especially do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love;

for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment,

it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years,

gracefully surrendering the things of youth.

Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.

But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings.

Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.

Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself.

You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars;

you have a right to be here.

And whether or not it is clear to you,

no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive him to be.

And whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life,

keep peace in your soul.

With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world.

Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.



Max Erhman - Desiderata

brandy sour


Joined: 09/04/2008
Posts: 310

Message Posted:
26/09/2008 21:02

Ripped off by a ice cream seller in Girne tells you the price after you have lick it and charges double.

ataturk


Joined: 09/09/2008
Posts: 712

Message Posted:
26/09/2008 23:43

JoandJelly lovely post. Sometimes we dont realise how lucky we are I constantly keep in touch with the UK and sometimes imagine how our lives would be should we ever have to go back. I have two boys aged 7 and 9 and everyday I drive them to school along the new road by the new Ezic I look at the mountains on one side and the sea on the other. I know the TRNC has its problems with builders, electric and so on but I think its worth it. When I sit out on my balcony and take in the fresh air and look at the view I realise how lucky we are and believe we made the right choice. I know its tough here and its nice to have this forum to have a moan and groan about the things that pee us off but on the whole we are really lucky guys.

Lemtich



Joined: 15/02/2007
Posts: 1487

Message Posted:
26/09/2008 23:55

Perhaps the Jehovah Wittnesses were right?



What a horrible thought.



Suicide beckons, I rang up the Samaritans and got put through to a call centre in Pakistan!



They asked if I could fly an aeroplane!!!!



God, I'm so fed up. I went to the doctors. I told the receptionist my appointment was at 5 o'clock.



Which doctor? she asked.



No an ordinary one, if one's available, I replied.



Now, one dosen't expect that sort of language from doctor's receptionists!



When I saw the quack he said, I haven't seen you for some time.



I explained, well, I've been ill.



I told him i'd been sleeping badly.



Invwhat way, he asked, nightmares?



I replied, well last night I dreamt I was a wigwam and the night before I dreamt I was a teepee!



You're too tense, he replied.



God I hate doctors, no sympathy whatsoever. Might as well live in North Cyprus.



Lem

KickingK


Joined: 14/09/2008
Posts: 90

Message Posted:
27/09/2008 14:33

I wonder where I would rather be?



I returned from Cyprus about a month ago after 3 wks holiday, we visit 3 times a year, everytime I return to the UK, I can't stop thinking of Cyprus. We live the dream.



I return to the " treadmill of life", work and the hope there will be a little sunshine.



I know where I would rather be!

daisy dukes


Joined: 06/09/2008
Posts: 3815

Message Posted:
27/09/2008 16:04

Hey Kimosh



I can certainly understand your misgivings here in Cyprus, for some people you either love a place or hate it...and you obviously hate it.

But there are things you can do, have you maybe thought about getting a little part time job in a bar or a restaurant...this is a fabulous way to meet people and earn a bit of pocket money or to help out with the builders electric!!



I myself am a little despondant at the moment, i had a car accident which has left me in a terrible condition, and as a passenger accepting a lift, asking someone if they have insurance is just not something you would ask...

to my detrement...my driver wasn't insured and neither was the drunk man who drove into us...who by the way ran off to Turkey a couple of days later....so i can understand why you're feeling low, but i'm quite sure many other people have had crappy days when nothing seems to go well. If leaving the island is not an option, then i would suggest you pour a glass of wine take a deep breath and ask yourself where else would you be happy...Maybe it's not the place you're upset with...maybe you're cross because moving here was just not the right move you. Whatever the reason, you only get one life and if being here makes you unhappy, then you really ought to think about an alternative place to be.



Do not let your feelings consume you....talk to people here...most folk have great advise and are funny to boot!! Just ask Nige...he's a funny bugger and defo cheers me up with his lil pearls of (not so pc) wisdom.



Take care Kimosh.......it could be worse, you could be sat in a dingy flat in UK watching Eastenders and eating beans on toast with the heating on in summer!!

DD

rosie123


Joined: 26/05/2008
Posts: 70

Message Posted:
27/09/2008 16:22

I think the best thing to do when considering living abroad is to rent for maybe a year or more,do not sell up in the UK.

I know so many who went on there holidays Cyprus,Spain etc,fell in love with sand,sea & wine,decided to move abroad,only to find living there full time was not for them,and could not afford to return home.

You can only look at mountains and sea for so long

And give North Cyprus time,most of the things you hate about the UK,you will have to put up with in Cyprus (not the weather )

Saying that i love North Cyprus

phylray



Joined: 21/09/2007
Posts: 1727

Message Posted:
28/09/2008 01:50

I came here on my own to work, and later bought, again alone.

Do not regret it, but I have a life here in Scotland too, and it is a

lovely place to visit. Yes, most folks are in couples, but still, it's

fine with me. Good to have somewhere my kids, family can come to.

w26kay



Joined: 14/10/2007
Posts: 479

Message Posted:
28/09/2008 04:01

Kimosh, i really dont believe that you dont have a life in TRNC.

For a start you have 3 kids and would have a wide circle of friends because of your children (unless you are a total recluse). You drop off and pick up at your kids school for a start.... Their own activities would involve kiddies parties, and extra curricula activites which would inevitably lead to interaction with other parents.



Even if your kids are older, you would stilll have that connection with school, parents and social activities, but on a more involved scale.



You need to get out more, meet people and that should be relatively easy with 3 kids. You are not on your own.

mickey rourke


Joined: 27/08/2008
Posts: 157

Message Posted:
28/09/2008 09:24

In my rather simplistic way I see these postings by Kim as a cry for help, again only my opinion but she seems to have suffered at the hands of some and she has been badly hurt, people must be more sensitive to issues like this and lend their support, Now I am not a religious person (so please bandwagon jumpers stay of this stage) but if you are Kim, perhaps a little chat with your local vicar or priest might help, only a thought, also there are sincere and trustworthy people out here who genuinely would lend an ear, not usually people who are in the limelight but people who go about things in a quiet way, seek them out and open up to them.

I wish you luck Kim, I was in a similar position myself and almost left this Island because of peoples lies and cheating, but I dug in, exposed these fraudsters and am now happier.

cruggs


Joined: 06/04/2008
Posts: 498

Message Posted:
29/09/2008 10:06

hi kimosh,so sorry to read of your plight,i can understand your frustration as

the world,seems to be against you at the moment. but my advise would be to

too look to the future and not to the past things can only get better for you.

have you considered doing voluntary work, i read that k.a.r need volunteers to help with the good work that they do for animals in kyrenia this would help you to meet other people,and perhaps take your mind off of other problems.

what ever you decide to do i wish you good luck.

PtePike



Joined: 20/05/2008
Posts: 2334

Message Posted:
29/09/2008 11:31

Have to say when someone claims they paid GBP£700 for 2 hours driving lessons I wonder if they are a genuine poster. Along with the points Kay made in msg 40.

Wilts Girl


Joined: 16/07/2008
Posts: 159

Message Posted:
29/09/2008 13:06

Pte Pike, I think the insinuation in Kimosh's post about the driving lesson was the £700 was some sort of bribe to get an examiner to pass a driver who was going to fail their test.



I might be wrong but it was under the thread about corruption and I think Kimosh was giving this as an example of corruption in TRNC.

Aga Buyers A G


Joined: 04/10/2007
Posts: 488

Message Posted:
29/09/2008 13:28

Corruption in the TRNC - NOOOOOOOOO surely not



ABAG

xxxxx





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