Neg Nick "joke of the Week"

negativenick


Joined: 10/11/2008
Posts: 6023

Message Posted:
16/03/2011 05:10

Bloke goes to pet shop and buys a talking budgie. When he gets it home it keeps saying eeh bye gum am a Yorkshire budgie and am as hard as chuffin nails.

Bloke gets fed up of this and sticks a kestrel in the cage with it to shut it up.



Next morning kestrel's dead and budgies givin it eeh am ard as nails yorkshire budgie me.

Right thinks bloke and sticks a Peregrine falcon in its cage. Next morning same sketch dead peregrine and a gobby ard as nails budgie.



Right thinks bloke and sticks a Golden Eagle in the cage.



Next morning the Eagle is dead but the budgie,s got no feathers and looks a bit ruffled. Whats up asks bloke.......





















"Bye 'eck" says Budgie had t' tek me jacket off to deal wi big bug*er.....

philbailey


Joined: 17/01/2011
Posts: 3533

Message Posted:
16/03/2011 23:53

I have often wondered what makes Japanese people tick.



Geiger counters.

philbailey


Joined: 17/01/2011
Posts: 3533

Message Posted:
17/03/2011 00:16

My mate makes clown shoes







Its no small feat

Hoylemiller



Joined: 03/09/2010
Posts: 240

Message Posted:
17/03/2011 08:20

A man goes into a lawyer's office and says, "I heard people have sued the Tobacco companies for giving them lung cancer, and KFC's for making them fat."





The lawyer says, "Yes, that's true."



The man says, "Well, I'm interested in suing too."



The lawyer says, "Okay, KFC's, or the Tobacco companies?"



The man says, "Neither, I'm suing John Smiths Breweries for all the ugly people I've slept with."