Teacher arrested at Ecan Airport.

negativenick


Joined: 10/11/2008
Posts: 6023

Message Posted:
07/06/2011 20:15

A public school teacher was arrested today at Ercan Airport as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a compass, a slide-rule and a calculator.



At a morning press conference, Attorney General, Safet Istmal, said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-Gebra movement.



He did not identify the man, who has been charged by Girne Police with carrying weapons of math instruction.



'Al-Gebra is a problem for us', the Attorney General said. 'They derive solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in search of absolute values.'



They use secret code names like 'X' and 'Y' and refer to themselves as 'unknowns', but we have determined that they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country.



As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, 'There are 3 sides to every triangle'.

philbailey


Joined: 17/01/2011
Posts: 3534

Message Posted:
07/06/2011 20:20

Very good.lol

Pipie


Joined: 05/01/2008
Posts: 5499

Message Posted:
07/06/2011 20:31

ya just get better !!

DutchCrusader



Joined: 19/05/2008
Posts: 11281

Message Posted:
07/06/2011 20:35

O how I admire originality!

▶ http://www.google.com/search?q=A+public+school+teacher+was+arrested+today&hl=en&num=10&lr=&ft=i&cr=&safe=images&tbs=

(About 9,040,000 results).

philbailey


Joined: 17/01/2011
Posts: 3534

Message Posted:
07/06/2011 20:37

Msg4, are your maps original ?

mikelapta



Joined: 20/11/2008
Posts: 2186

Message Posted:
07/06/2011 20:43

And if only he could spell the name of the airport correctly in his title "Ecan"?.



No wonder he cannot find TRNC

Brinsley


Joined: 04/04/2009
Posts: 6858

Message Posted:
07/06/2011 20:47

Msg 6

If only Msg 4 payed income tax!



Richard

DutchCrusader



Joined: 19/05/2008
Posts: 11281

Message Posted:
07/06/2011 20:49

@ msg 5, philbailey: Yes. And I paid for all the expensive graphic software I use and for the right to use basic eMaps maps. And your point is?

negativenick


Joined: 10/11/2008
Posts: 6023

Message Posted:
07/06/2011 20:53

mess 8



cock

DutchCrusader



Joined: 19/05/2008
Posts: 11281

Message Posted:
07/06/2011 21:03

@ msg 9: Well done! No spelling errors! You can do it, I told you.

shrimp


Joined: 01/09/2010
Posts: 939

Message Posted:
07/06/2011 21:11

Well, it made me laugh which I think was the whole objective of the excercise.......keep them coming...............

suehowlittle


Joined: 31/10/2010
Posts: 1202

Message Posted:
07/06/2011 21:41

Nick, take no notice, the fact that your posts are 'not original' has nothing to do with the fact that they often make us laugh, why do some members think that if something is 'not original' its not valid?



You found it on the net and shared it with us and thats good enough for most of us.



Please don't stop!

deputydawg


Joined: 30/03/2010
Posts: 1727

Message Posted:
07/06/2011 21:51

NN . I calculate that DC will go to any "lengths" never to laugh.

JohhnyLee


Joined: 25/04/2009
Posts: 2495

Message Posted:
07/06/2011 21:52

Actually what many of you will not know is that N.N. Is probably one of the most intelligent and successful men to ever use this forum.



Also underneath his wit and fun a very straight sincere guy.



He makes us laugh, Keep it up N.N.

Pipie


Joined: 05/01/2008
Posts: 5499

Message Posted:
07/06/2011 21:56

Have to agree, Johnny Lee NN is sooooooooooooo funny !!

paddywack


Joined: 04/05/2009
Posts: 959

Message Posted:
07/06/2011 22:31

14--15

I knew he could`nt be so stupid as he makes out.

ttoli


Joined: 24/03/2007
Posts: 1172

Message Posted:
07/06/2011 23:27

As I was carrying out a routine smear test this morning I turned to my patient and said "Excuse me for asking, but does your husband satisfy you in the bedroom?"



"That's a very personal question doctor," she replied, "Why do you ask?"



"Well I might be jumping to conclusions Frau Grubel", I answered, "But it's not often I find an outbreak of E.coli around the cervix."

yorgozlu



Joined: 16/06/2009
Posts: 4437

Message Posted:
07/06/2011 23:52

We sometimes take English for granted

But if we examine its paradoxes we find that

Quicksand takes you down slowly

Boxing rings are square

And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.



If writers write, how come fingers don‘t fing.

If the plural of tooth is teeth

Shouldn‘t the plural of phone booth be phone beeth

If the teacher taught,

Why didn‘t the preacher praught.



If a vegetarian eats vegetables

What the heck does a humanitarian eat?

Why do people recite at a play

Yet play at a recital?

Park on driveways and

Drive on parkways

How can the weather be as hot as hell on one day

And as cold as hell on another



You have to marvel at the unique lunacy

Of a language where a house can burn up as

It burns down

And in which you fill in a form

By filling it out

And a bell is only heard once it goes!



English was invented by people, not computers

And it reflects the creativity of the human race

(Which of course isn‘t a race at all)



That is why

When

yorgozlu



Joined: 16/06/2009
Posts: 4437

Message Posted:
07/06/2011 23:53

msg 18 cont;

That is why

When the stars are out they are visible

But when the lights are out they are invisible

And why it is that when I wind up my watch

It starts

But when I wind up this poem

It ends.

ttoli


Joined: 24/03/2007
Posts: 1172

Message Posted:
08/06/2011 00:29

Why, when you tell someone that you are off on Holiday soon, do they ask "Oh, Anywhere nice?"

steptoenoel


Joined: 27/04/2011
Posts: 116

Message Posted:
08/06/2011 01:58

I understood the airport called ercan was named after a turkisk pilot who was killed in the ..we will call it the conflict

cyprusman3



Joined: 09/06/2009
Posts: 297

Message Posted:
08/06/2011 07:34

yorgoz you should take over from negativnick as hes obviously not up to your standard )))

DutchCrusader



Joined: 19/05/2008
Posts: 11281

Message Posted:
08/06/2011 08:06

Some (many) find my posts in NN's joke threads (very) irritating. I can understand that - I find it irritating when NN joins a thread that I start. Because, in both cases usually nothing sensible is added. So here's a proposal. I stay away from NN's threads and he does the same when I start a thread about history. Acceptable, NN?

stockiefan


Joined: 04/05/2009
Posts: 574

Message Posted:
08/06/2011 08:28

Dutch, why not stay away from the board, full stop!!!

yorgozlu



Joined: 16/06/2009
Posts: 4437

Message Posted:
08/06/2011 08:39

DC-RE 23;

I would NOT stay away from his so called threads all the while he is insulting my birth place/homeland with his so called,apearently 'funny' jokes,but reply in same manners.**** him,why should I or you want a deal from someone who is not even brave enough to show ones face?



I WILL hijack every thread he starts that insults my country.



brave enough?



ban me.

proger1



Joined: 18/04/2009
Posts: 2919

Message Posted:
08/06/2011 09:47

Don't do it Nick, I had a truce with Hans right up until he decided it would be humourous to take the mickey on my return.



and don't ban yorg, make him a mod

TopTen


Joined: 15/04/2009
Posts: 1246

Message Posted:
08/06/2011 11:13

Hear hear Proger1 Sal tells it like it is

negativenick


Joined: 10/11/2008
Posts: 6023

Message Posted:
08/06/2011 12:51

mess 25 - makes one wonder why the gc's couldn't get on with you..........

ttoli


Joined: 24/03/2007
Posts: 1172

Message Posted:
08/06/2011 12:59

Depends on whether they catagorise themselves by the language that they speak, than being Cypriot.

proger1



Joined: 18/04/2009
Posts: 2919

Message Posted:
08/06/2011 13:04

no use trying to get negative again nick, JL has grassed you up now, we all know you are a wonderful person who is just putting up a facade

negativenick


Joined: 10/11/2008
Posts: 6023

Message Posted:
08/06/2011 16:53

mess 30 - drat, drat and double drat..........



snickin fickin johnny lee...........







Oh - and long live Worzel and his kfc...

proger1



Joined: 18/04/2009
Posts: 2919

Message Posted:
08/06/2011 16:57

who was that bleedin stick figure that worzel had the hots for ????

negativenick


Joined: 10/11/2008
Posts: 6023

Message Posted:
08/06/2011 17:01

mess 32 - knowing him its prob a sheep or maybe a chicken - judging by the state of him, he can't afford to be too choosy......





long live the KFC...........

proger1



Joined: 18/04/2009
Posts: 2919

Message Posted:
08/06/2011 17:03

not that worzel, the one from the telly

ttoli


Joined: 24/03/2007
Posts: 1172

Message Posted:
08/06/2011 17:06

Aunt Sally (Una Stubbs), I think?

wormy



Joined: 24/05/2010
Posts: 31

Message Posted:
08/06/2011 17:14

Right ttoli, and her rival was Dolly Clothespeg

yorgozlu



Joined: 16/06/2009
Posts: 4437

Message Posted:
08/06/2011 17:17

Throwing a stone and hiding behind the hedge must be an english thing.Fortunately for me though,I had ficked too many of YOU in the past.



long live coward english.

AnthonySmith


Joined: 14/05/2009
Posts: 455

Message Posted:
08/06/2011 18:44

NN, thought it was a great joke. New to C44 and a number of members. Obviously, only the British have a sense of humour.

mikelapta



Joined: 20/11/2008
Posts: 2186

Message Posted:
08/06/2011 19:21

Neg Nick,you "pinch"jokes from elsewhere,you insult TRNC and members of 44.

You live in Thailand,but are on this forum more than AJ used to be.

Are your 2 birds in school,or on the game making money for you ?



I had a choice of a holiday a few weeks ago...see my friends in Thailand,or visit the Phillipines,

I loved the Phillipines,and no chance of meeting you there



Get a life,NN,play with your little girls in Thailand.Do you/have you had time to check?



Leave TRNC to the people that like it here,and don't want to leave like you did.



I think your ex Russian bird is still happy with the poolman !!!!



We do not need your pathetic,stupid remarks on virtually every forum.

ivebinad


Joined: 03/06/2011
Posts: 224

Message Posted:
08/06/2011 19:54

mikelapta sadly you sound very bitter and twisted or maybe just jealous of NN

ivebinad


Joined: 03/06/2011
Posts: 224

Message Posted:
08/06/2011 20:03

Yorg your msg 37 is a bit rich isn't it seeing as you and your family fled the '74 troubles to the safety of the UK, where you were educated, employed or more likely on benefits and you clearly are not very bright so benefits it is then...made enough money off the backs off the brits to return and retire back to your homeland where you slag off the turks who saved the tc population in order for you to have a country to return to, now you have the audacity to call brits cowardly, look in the mirror mate, or maybe in your family album.

simbas



Joined: 16/07/2007
Posts: 5943

Message Posted:
08/06/2011 20:06

Keep on track please

Simbas

mikelapta



Joined: 20/11/2008
Posts: 2186

Message Posted:
08/06/2011 20:06

Kevin,no just sick of a stupid man,ex TRNC,posting such crap on virtually every posting.

He left TRNC,for,supposedly a better life in Thailand.

And me?a wonderful holiday in Phillipines,and a new fiancee !!!

I assure you I am not bitter and twisted !!!

I am planning a new life,either in Philli or here.

I love Northern Cyprus,and always will defend my friends here.

Look at NN's postings !!!He is bitter and twisted !!!!

ivebinad


Joined: 03/06/2011
Posts: 224

Message Posted:
08/06/2011 20:14

Mike, if I were you I would go to the Phillipines, I hope you thoroughly enjoy your new life and I wish you all the best. As for NN, he amuses me and a lot of what he says is true, I did meet him a couple of times and thought he was a real decent bloke, he really is very bright.

yorgozlu



Joined: 16/06/2009
Posts: 4437

Message Posted:
09/06/2011 00:11

msg 41;

You reminded me of what I used to be told if I had mentioned anything about the way UK was being run,whilst in UK!



'If you don't like how it is here,**** off back to where you came from'.......is what I used to be told...........whilst having to work for 16 hours a day.



In any case,my insulting comments are for one particular person who happens to be english,but feel free to take it personnaly.

yorgozlu



Joined: 16/06/2009
Posts: 4437

Message Posted:
09/06/2011 00:31

msg 41;



Your bright-ness shines through your comments!



long live corrupt english

ttoli


Joined: 24/03/2007
Posts: 1172

Message Posted:
09/06/2011 00:33

My connection to KKTC, is growing up along side a TC family in the UK, who still welcome me as their own, they worked their B@llocks off, 7 days a week, 16 hour days etc, stashing the money away for their children and retirement, Kids are through college and newly married(Starting a life of their own), The parents are now realising their dream of retiring to their homeland, but are being shafted just as much as we Brits are, Can you imagine just how they feel?.



Have not met Yorg yet, but I can see where He's coming from, Sure, its not perfect here, but where is?, Ive made mistakes here, we all have, take stock of what you have rather than being resentful for what you dont.



NN,I May still make that trip, Only for a holiday though, coz this is home (and No I havent stacked the Scooter yet!)

yorgozlu



Joined: 16/06/2009
Posts: 4437

Message Posted:
09/06/2011 00:54

ttoli;

I live on the outskirts of Lapta/Karsiyaka.Fell free to pop in anytime.There might even be another friend or 2,if it's a weekend.

0533 873 9181,e-mailad is in my profile.

Some like to judge the book by it's cover,I don't.

ttoli


Joined: 24/03/2007
Posts: 1172

Message Posted:
09/06/2011 00:59

I may well do, Thank you.