Neg Nick "joke of the Week"

negativenick


Joined: 10/11/2008
Posts: 6023

Message Posted:
13/07/2011 02:17

ʎɐqǝ uo pɹɐoqʎǝʞ ɐ ʎnq ı ǝɯıʇ ʇsɐן ǝɥʇ sı sıɥʇ

philbailey


Joined: 17/01/2011
Posts: 3534

Message Posted:
13/07/2011 02:19

From Australia?

zihni007


Joined: 11/06/2011
Posts: 85

Message Posted:
13/07/2011 02:21

from new zealand?

philbailey


Joined: 17/01/2011
Posts: 3534

Message Posted:
13/07/2011 02:24

The wife went to a Meatloaf concert an bought some souvenir knickers.

On the front it said "I'LL DO ANYTHING FOR LOVE" and on the back it said "BUT I WONT DO THAT" !!!

zihni007


Joined: 11/06/2011
Posts: 85

Message Posted:
13/07/2011 02:35

man said to his wife ;why is it every time i look at the mirror naked i get erection?



wife replayed ;even your manhood thinks you are a









Post edited for offensive expletive...... Simbas

philbailey


Joined: 17/01/2011
Posts: 3534

Message Posted:
13/07/2011 02:37

One of my mates fulfilled a lifelong dream and became a mime artist.



I haven't heard from him since.

BeirutPecker


Joined: 30/06/2011
Posts: 24

Message Posted:
13/07/2011 03:09

There are 3 kinds of people: those who can count and those who can't

suehowlittle


Joined: 31/10/2010
Posts: 1202

Message Posted:
13/07/2011 09:42

Mess 5 - sinking to new lows I think

Pipie


Joined: 05/01/2008
Posts: 5499

Message Posted:
13/07/2011 09:48

Shocking message 5 i hope you are banned.

eyebob


Joined: 22/06/2010
Posts: 143

Message Posted:
13/07/2011 10:26

Methinks mess 5 put on to get reaction!!!!

simbas



Joined: 16/07/2007
Posts: 5943

Message Posted:
13/07/2011 10:29

Msg 5 , edited as reason given ,

Simbas

simbas



Joined: 16/07/2007
Posts: 5943

Message Posted:
13/07/2011 10:36

Well he certainly got one eyebob

Simbas

Pipie


Joined: 05/01/2008
Posts: 5499

Message Posted:
13/07/2011 10:43

not really Simbas he should have been banned not just edited !!

Hoylemiller



Joined: 03/09/2010
Posts: 240

Message Posted:
13/07/2011 19:13

I got an e- mail today from a local bored housewife looking for some 'hot action'. "cool what did you do"?

"I sent her my ironing that'll keep her happy".



Told my girlfriend to go get me a beer from the fridge, she moaned "there's nothing worse than a male chauvinist pig"!

I said "there is actually"

"A woman who won't do as she's told".



.

simbas



Joined: 16/07/2007
Posts: 5943

Message Posted:
13/07/2011 19:16

He was not just edited Pipie , i can assure you

Simbas

No1Doyen


Joined: 04/07/2008
Posts: 16617

Message Posted:
13/07/2011 19:51

Walked downstairs this morning and my son randomly asked me,

"What's a shitzu, Dad?"

I said,

"One with no animals in it mate."    

No1Doyen


Joined: 04/07/2008
Posts: 16617

Message Posted:
13/07/2011 20:15

Quasimodo is running along a street being chased by a pack of children.



He stops, turns around and shouts, "Will you all get lost! I haven't got your bloody ball!"    

philbailey


Joined: 17/01/2011
Posts: 3534

Message Posted:
13/07/2011 20:19

My wife has an ass like J-Lo



wait I meant jello.

No1Doyen


Joined: 04/07/2008
Posts: 16617

Message Posted:
13/07/2011 20:35

I was in London today and jumped into a black cab. I said, "Waterloo, mate."



He said, "The station?"



"Well, I'm a bit late for the war."    

negativenick


Joined: 10/11/2008
Posts: 6023

Message Posted:
14/07/2011 06:20

A Police Officer came round to ours last night and said “I’m afraid it’s your wife – she looks like she’s been hit by a bus”.







I replied, “yes ok, but she’s got a fantastic personality”

braveheart


Joined: 11/03/2011
Posts: 19

Message Posted:
14/07/2011 07:02

It's a rough life





There was a man who really took care of his body. He lifted weights

and jogged six miles every day. One morning he looked into the mirror,

admiring his body, and noticed that he was suntanned all over with the

exception of his penis. So he decided to do something about that.

He went to the beach, undressed completely, and buried himself in the

sand, except for his penis, which he left sticking out of the sand.

A bit later, two little old ladies came strolling along the beach, one

using a cane to help her get along. Upon seeing the thing sticking out

of the sand, the lady with the cane began to move the penis around

with her cane.

Remarking to the other little old lady, she said, "There really is no

justice in the world."

The other little old lady asked, "What do you mean by that?"

The first little old lady replied, "Look at that. When I was 20, I was

curious about it. When I was 30, I enjoyed it. When I was 40, I asked

for it. When I was 50, I pa