Liverpool City Centre Closed

JohhnyLee


Joined: 25/04/2009
Posts: 2495

Message Posted:
21/07/2011 11:34

Police have closed down Liverpool City centre after a suspicious looking object was found in a car.



It later turned out to be a tax disc.

negativenick


Joined: 10/11/2008
Posts: 6023

Message Posted:
21/07/2011 13:00

top post JL........................

deputydawg


Joined: 30/03/2010
Posts: 1727

Message Posted:
21/07/2011 13:38

A football supporter in Liverpool went to the aid of a pensioner who was attacked in the street by a rabid dog. He protected the pensioner but sustained injuries which necessitated admission to hospital. A newspaper reporter was soon at his bedside for a local hero story. We will run with the headline "Hero, Liverpool supporter saves pensioner from savage dog attack", said the reporter. The injured hero said "No good, I am not a Liverpool supporter" The reporter said "Headline, Hero Everton supporter saves pensioner from savage attack by dog". The Supporter replied "still no good, I am here to support Arsenal against Liverpool tomorrow. The paper that day headlined "Oik, cockney football supporter carries out unprovoked attack on much loved family pet" !

jock1



Joined: 06/01/2008
Posts: 3786

Message Posted:
21/07/2011 14:01

...............

Hoylemiller



Joined: 03/09/2010
Posts: 240

Message Posted:
21/07/2011 14:46

The Pope is on tour in Liverpool handin out miracles. Scouse asks "can you help with my hearin"? Pope puts his hands on Scousers ears, prays, removes his hands and says

"hows your hearing now"?

Scouse says "i don't know its not till next Wednesday".

hattikins


Joined: 17/02/2008
Posts: 2793

Message Posted:
21/07/2011 15:18

There is a new mountain appeared in the centre of Liverpool, it's known as Killamanforhisgiro.

DoctorW


Joined: 28/11/2010
Posts: 334

Message Posted:
21/07/2011 15:22

Went to Liverpool once.



Parked my car by the side of the road and a young lad comes up to me and offers to look after my car for a fiver'



I told him my car didnt need looking after as I had left my rottweiler in there.



Puts out fires then does he? he replied.

philbailey


Joined: 17/01/2011
Posts: 3534

Message Posted:
21/07/2011 23:53

A scuose bird goes on Jeremy Kyle for a DNA test





















she wanted to know who the mother was

Tonyta


Joined: 11/06/2011
Posts: 122

Message Posted:
23/07/2011 17:32

Police raid on a house next to the library in picton road found 50 kilos of drugs, many weapons including a machine gun as well as over £500,000 in used banknotes.



A local when asked expressed his utter surprise that there was a library in picton road.



We scousers tell the best jokes

philbailey


Joined: 17/01/2011
Posts: 3534

Message Posted:
23/07/2011 17:36

My mate told me for his stag night he wanted to be surrounded by C**** and be pissed out of his mind





I bought him a 6 pack of stella and a ticket to anfield

birdman



Joined: 20/09/2010
Posts: 690

Message Posted:
23/07/2011 23:07

100 Liverpudlians were asked if they would like the UK monetary system to change. 98% of them said No they were happy with the GIRO.

goonerhus


Joined: 17/01/2011
Posts: 40

Message Posted:
23/07/2011 23:33

A PRETTY GIRL GOES TO A BAR IN LIVERPOOL AND MEETS UP WITH A SCOUSER..THEY FLIRT AND DANCE ALL NIGHT THE THE GIRL ASKS ' DO YOU WANT TO COME BACK TO MY PLACE ' 'THAT WOULD BE NICE' REPLIES THE SCOUSER SO OFF THEY WENT TO HER APARTMENT. AS THE NİGHT FELL THEY WERE MAKING LOVE THEN THE GIRL TOOK OUT A PAIR OF HANDCUFFS AND SAID 'TIE ME UP BABY AND BE MY NAUGHTY BOY' SO THE SCOUSER DID..THEN SHE SAYS COMON BABE SHOW ME WHAT SCOUSERS DO BEST.................................SO HE TAKES HER PLAZMA AND RUNS OFF.......................

PhilUK


Joined: 31/03/2010
Posts: 236

Message Posted:
23/07/2011 23:36

mess 11- very appropriate, I recall that the GIRO system is based in Bootle-keep close to your clients eh?