its obviously silly season again

rowlo



Joined: 12/10/2008
Posts: 4796

Message Posted:
13/03/2012 22:33

can i buy a car in the south and bring it north ?



how much is the grub in trnc ?



will my ice cream van make any money ?



these are questions posted on cypr44 at the moment , did these people not enquire before they posted on here ?



no wonder the birds dont fxxxxxg sing , do your homework peeps .

dizzycows


Joined: 12/05/2009
Posts: 2736

Message Posted:
13/03/2012 22:58

nuff to drive you to drink isnt it ,....

hattikins


Joined: 17/02/2008
Posts: 2793

Message Posted:
13/03/2012 23:11

So, who sells the cheapest Efes

Marion


Joined: 06/03/2011
Posts: 1816

Message Posted:
13/03/2012 23:14

I want to know where the ice cream van is, now that summer is around the corner. then if I support him, he/she could make money!

eyebob


Joined: 22/06/2010
Posts: 143

Message Posted:
13/03/2012 23:21

Ice cream van comes past our house every day in Catalkoy,nice Turkish salesman,cheap ices too!!

britvic



Joined: 05/09/2008
Posts: 3039

Message Posted:
13/03/2012 23:27

Does the ice cream stay cold in Northern Cyprus, and how long for? By the way I have lost my cat named nibbles and need a job and a place to rent, I would also like to borrow a dog for a couple of months.



Thank you in advance.



P.S I am speakin in prefect unglish and terkish

EricCrapton



Joined: 30/12/2010
Posts: 325

Message Posted:
13/03/2012 23:39

I think some people have got too much time on their hands!

Woodspeckie


Joined: 25/01/2009
Posts: 2263

Message Posted:
13/03/2012 23:42

I want to buy a phone, i am a teacher and want to learn how to write a sentence with capital letters and full stops, i want to know where to eat.

Marion


Joined: 06/03/2011
Posts: 1816

Message Posted:
13/03/2012 23:43

thanks eyebob, but a long way to walk to get an ice cream! Ask him if he is going out West any time!

Woodspeckie


Joined: 25/01/2009
Posts: 2263

Message Posted:
13/03/2012 23:51

Marion.You will be OK when the Ice cream man from the UK arrives in NC.

Blackbird



Joined: 11/08/2009
Posts: 1432

Message Posted:
13/03/2012 23:57

Woodspeckie - which route is best for the ice cream van? And how much tax will be due on the ice cream in Cyprus?

dizzycows


Joined: 12/05/2009
Posts: 2736

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 00:02

msg 6, you can have my pussy for a while if you like, she has 9 kittens and is expecting again, I just havent the money to keep her, and she smells . And my 10 dogs dont bite, only on a sunday, you can have them till I come back from where I dont know yet .. ..



Ice cream man is cycling from Dover and expected next month, it will still be coldish ...

Woodspeckie


Joined: 25/01/2009
Posts: 2263

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 00:04

Can the ice cream man go over to the South to buy his ice cream to sell in the North, will he get a 90 day visa

Glasbury


Joined: 13/08/2010
Posts: 268

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 00:05

Well.....I don't like icecream only sorbet.........can you buy sorbet in NC ?

dublinderm


Joined: 26/09/2009
Posts: 538

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 00:06

Flights don't forget flights.



How do I get from Larnaca to Ulan Bator with a stopover in Hull?



It is not like these people are connected to the Internet or anything.



DD



PS Where can I get my wife's piles looked at in Catalkoy??

dizzycows


Joined: 12/05/2009
Posts: 2736

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 00:11

your wifes piles can be seen by the plumber who is the ice cream man ... he carries his tools with his ice cream...



SORBET.... !!!! wash your mouth out ... ....

Blackbird



Joined: 11/08/2009
Posts: 1432

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 00:13

Is ice cream more expensive in TRNC than in UK?

dizzycows


Joined: 12/05/2009
Posts: 2736

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 00:16

No but corn plasters are, ...

Woodspeckie


Joined: 25/01/2009
Posts: 2263

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 00:20

Is the strawberry sauce on the ice cream organic?

Brinsley


Joined: 04/04/2009
Posts: 6858

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 00:22

Heard the music but where is he!

http://youtu.be/RDpNN7hADdY



Richard

Turtle


Joined: 28/05/2007
Posts: 2669

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 00:28

Brins ,.. get me a "99" and 2 screwballs if you find him.

eastendjoker


Joined: 24/04/2008
Posts: 166

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 00:50

i was very surprised to see an ice cream van creeping around Chelsey village last summer !

astro941


Joined: 22/05/2011
Posts: 193

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 01:44

The fish man who is coming could team up with the icecream man, perfect use of refrigation and conservation of fuel. Iced shrimp cornet.

jimchris09


Joined: 13/02/2009
Posts: 547

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 02:13

Great posts...haven't laughed so much in ages!

ttoli


Joined: 24/03/2007
Posts: 1172

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 03:01

and Who'd have thought to use the search function at the top?????

Sandford


Joined: 17/12/2011
Posts: 133

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 03:07

Brilliant



Give a dog a home...........

charlieb


Joined: 17/12/2009
Posts: 95

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 06:44

What a way to start the day, so funny.

yenibob


Joined: 13/10/2010
Posts: 1203

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 06:56

So the basic tenet of this thread is "don't ask questions on 44", do your research via the internet?



I thought asking questions of people on 44 was doing research via the internet, and was the main point of the site?

deputydawg


Joined: 30/03/2010
Posts: 1727

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 08:39

Wot about the whingers who post ? Why mention organic food which is another total scam? After a protracted period of paying premium prices in Asda for Organic food I left a note for the manager at Customer Services as they refused to explain why I had not had one single orgasm. The Wildebeest (Bless her), for some reason, then refused to be seen with me anywhere near Asda.

britvic



Joined: 05/09/2008
Posts: 3039

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 11:00

Help! I have itchy elbow syndrome, I have tried putting mustard and mayonnaise on it but its not working....What should I try next?

Nibbles is still missing and still no offers for the Dog.

davpat


Joined: 23/08/2011
Posts: 225

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 11:24

Dizzycows,Message 6,...Thanks for the offer of loaning your pussy,very thoughtfull!!!!

dizzycows


Joined: 12/05/2009
Posts: 2736

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 11:24

Sorry only got bitches, no dogs ...



Try icecream , better still, use an enema with tabasco and curry powder ... the ice cream man has nibbles in his fridge, he is keeping him fresh ... with the fish ...

hattikins


Joined: 17/02/2008
Posts: 2793

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 11:25

Britvic, you could try liver pate, now available in some supermarkets but not sure of the price. If it does nothing for your elbow you can give it to Nibbles or offer it as a bogoff with the dog.

dizzycows


Joined: 12/05/2009
Posts: 2736

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 11:25

No prob davpat... its died any way ... ...

Sandford


Joined: 17/12/2011
Posts: 133

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 12:16

Dizzy,



I am posting this for a friend, and can recommend their pussy management services. They will keep your pussy clean and sparkling with twice weekly visits in the summer. They only use the best products to UK standards and satisfaction is guaranteed.

Redwine


Joined: 15/01/2009
Posts: 565

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 13:06

How do I get to Esentepe from the bottom of the hill.

Redwine


Joined: 15/01/2009
Posts: 565

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 13:08

Anyone know the price of a tin of Tuna - is there a supermaket in TRNC?

Dizzy does your pussy like Tuna or kippers

TopTen


Joined: 15/04/2009
Posts: 1246

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 13:14

Its raining in Karsiyaka!!!!!!!!!!

britvic



Joined: 05/09/2008
Posts: 3039

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 13:26

"Try icecream , better still, use an enema with tabasco and curry powder ... the ice cream man has nibbles in his fridge, he is keeping him fresh ... with the fish ..."



"Britvic, you could try liver pate, now available in some supermarkets but not sure of the price. If it does nothing for your elbow you can give it to Nibbles or offer it as a bogoff with the dog."



Tried this guys, I now smell like a Chinese takeaway, and its still itchy! Maybe I should try Marmite, at least it will keep the Mosquitoes off my elbow.



Been meaning to ask......What's the weather like in July/August?

Redwine


Joined: 15/01/2009
Posts: 565

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 13:57

What's the weather like where uk - ukraine - Russia depends where you are be more specific please.



Where can I buy ginger biscuits?



More interested in Dizzy'e pussy

Brinsley


Joined: 04/04/2009
Posts: 6858

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 14:01

Does it rain in July/August and what clothes should I bring out?!



Richard

Redwine


Joined: 15/01/2009
Posts: 565

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 14:07

Wellie, Berhaus, scarf woolie jumper, leggings, over coat - that's what I wear

LittleTed


Joined: 11/01/2012
Posts: 349

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 14:39

My Dog likes Ice Cream, when is the Ice Cream man due in Alsncak and can he also do my boiler as solar panel for some reason is not working too well with the present weather conditions.Has anyone info please??

Redwine


Joined: 15/01/2009
Posts: 565

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 14:40

This has been the only sensible post on C44 for ages. Posters take heed before you post nonsensical rubbish.



By the way how do I open a tin of beans

jock1



Joined: 06/01/2008
Posts: 3786

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 14:47

or..i am a single woman out here, can someone come and trim my bush...

what time is news at ten on ?

britvic



Joined: 05/09/2008
Posts: 3039

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 14:50

Coming over to NC around September time, can I ask, does it get dark at night? Redwine, when you figure out how to open your tin of beans, can you let me know how, I could try them on my elbow?

LittleTed


Joined: 11/01/2012
Posts: 349

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 14:50

It depends where you are in the house at the time because if you are in the bath you might have to ring a neighbour to come and let the stray dog out thats looking for a home and the icecream man. Has DC got any links for your car parking area or even better the size of your bathroom.

LittleTed


Joined: 11/01/2012
Posts: 349

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 14:54

Message 47 is RE Message 44 How to open tin of beans.Did nt know we could get beans here, recommendations wanted on how to plant them.Will they grow in this climate????

Jefferson


Joined: 17/05/2010
Posts: 360

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 14:56

You have all forgotten the Residency posts. Where do I go? How long does it take? Does it take less time if you are over 60?( In my experience no) and do you really need to get residency anyway.

jock1



Joined: 06/01/2008
Posts: 3786

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 14:58

or some off them...How do i get dressed in the mornings, can someone please come and tie my shoe laces...

Redwine


Joined: 15/01/2009
Posts: 565

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 14:59

Yes they grow well as long as you put bacon and eggs round them after plantin. Also you need a little oil.



Jock I have a strimmer that does the job well - also gets rid of crabs and lobsters. News at ten on at midnight.

Redwine


Joined: 15/01/2009
Posts: 565

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 15:02

Do I need a work permit to change my light bulb - infact how do I replace a lightbulb - do I need a plumber.

Jock just realied I don't have work permit so I can't trim your bush - some expat might shop me.

Brinsley


Joined: 04/04/2009
Posts: 6858

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 15:03

If the News at Ten is on at midnight, do I assume that there is a two hour time difference between the UK & TRNC?!



Richard

Redwine


Joined: 15/01/2009
Posts: 565

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 15:05

You can tell I am retired I have nothing better to do than post on here - must get a hobby and a life before I snuff it

Redwine


Joined: 15/01/2009
Posts: 565

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 15:06

Brinsly you are the most intelliget on here I couldn't figure it out why it was on at midnight thought it was a misprint in guide

jock1



Joined: 06/01/2008
Posts: 3786

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 15:08

Beautiful Gorgeous stunning Girl walks in to the doctors surgery, The doc says..right take your clothes off..i want to examine you.

She say's where will i put them ?

Doc says...ON TOP OFF MINE......

LittleTed


Joined: 11/01/2012
Posts: 349

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 15:09

Is News at Ten available in Turkish as stray dog doesnt understand English unless its dinner time and why cant I get News at Ten on BBC1??

Redwine


Joined: 15/01/2009
Posts: 565

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 15:12

You can get euro news in most languages so your dog should understand one of them.

LittleTed


Joined: 11/01/2012
Posts: 349

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 15:20

Wanted Self opening Tin of Beans, preferably Heinz and can you send piccies please with complete instructions in Arabic as Im going out tonight but want something to read in bed when Iget back,.

RedWine Iwill forward these on to you

Brinsley


Joined: 04/04/2009
Posts: 6858

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 15:25

I'm confused. If my night flight ticket to TRNC from LHR states it departs at 10pm, does it really mean 12 midnight? If not, do TRNC bound flights show News at Ten on the airplanes?!



Richard

LittleTed


Joined: 11/01/2012
Posts: 349

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 15:28

Depens on whether they can get BBC1

Redwine


Joined: 15/01/2009
Posts: 565

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 15:47

Little Ted thanks. I. starving - is anyone else hungry. I might start a new thread. Title "Are you hungry but can't open tin of beans" It could be the most interesting thread this year

padisha


Joined: 09/07/2011
Posts: 131

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 15:57

do you have to push a 'push chair' or is it also ok to pull a 'push chair'? ice cream is beyond me these days.

Redwine


Joined: 15/01/2009
Posts: 565

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 15:59

INteresting so if you pull it it must be a pullchair.

Brinsley


Joined: 04/04/2009
Posts: 6858

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 16:00

Pull a push-chair? Try pulling a woman!



Richard

Sandford


Joined: 17/12/2011
Posts: 133

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 16:01

Can I buy organic baked beans from an illegal builder, or do I have to cross the border to insure my mobile phone?



Is Rowlo's opinion humble or arrogant?

Redwine


Joined: 15/01/2009
Posts: 565

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 16:03

Doesn't matter whether organic or not still makes an illegal builder f**t

dizzycows


Joined: 12/05/2009
Posts: 2736

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 16:12

Is the days in NC 24hrs or do the hours go on to the next day? very important for the taxi drivers who are blind, as they cant tell if they are on the road or still asleep...

padisha


Joined: 09/07/2011
Posts: 131

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 16:22

would f-rting help illegal builders to build crap houses?

Redwine


Joined: 15/01/2009
Posts: 565

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 16:44

AAhh you got it it's the beans - and they know how to open the tins!!! Well done padisha.

LittleTed


Joined: 11/01/2012
Posts: 349

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 16:45

RE Message 66

Tried doing this the other day.You must have Residency and have Work permit and also take Blood test results and Chest Xrays and also a clean police record checked by Scotland Yard, unopened can of Beans ,a solicitor who is useless coupled with his cousin who is overpaid accountantant, they will charge you something rediculous as we all have TL growing trees in our garden, also you have to take neighbours cat with you so you can have someone to talk to who you can get more sense out of than any of the above.



Where can i get a Right handed toothbrush????

Redwine


Joined: 15/01/2009
Posts: 565

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 16:50

I have a right handed wire brush if that's any help

LittleTed


Joined: 11/01/2012
Posts: 349

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 17:17

Redwine

Have you any piccies please? and then I need EFES flavoured Colgate

Redwine


Joined: 15/01/2009
Posts: 565

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 17:24

Can help there. Take a swig of Effes keep in mouth and clean teeth - don't spit out as it wastes the Effes



___________LLLLLLLL wire brush RH

chriswife


Joined: 30/03/2011
Posts: 449

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 17:26

this is their research hence the forum

Redwine


Joined: 15/01/2009
Posts: 565

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 17:29

whos research

dizzycows


Joined: 12/05/2009
Posts: 2736

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 17:35

the baked beans silly...

mamachina


Joined: 22/11/2008
Posts: 730

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 17:50

When will it stop raining - does it always rain in Cyprus? Its too wet to go out bean hunting - do I need a licence and is it the hunting season?

yenibob


Joined: 13/10/2010
Posts: 1203

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 17:58

I was going to do a poll on who is the stupidest person on 44. This thread has saved me loads of time. All I have to do now is monitor the candidates to ensure THEY don't ask questions

hattikins


Joined: 17/02/2008
Posts: 2793

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 18:00

where can I get a sense of humour fitted and how much would it cost

Brinsley


Joined: 04/04/2009
Posts: 6858

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 18:04

Yeniflop

Start at the top and stay there. Many accolades will follow!



Richard

yenibob


Joined: 13/10/2010
Posts: 1203

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 18:07

That is so cool, I have my very own internet stalker. He may not be very bright, but he is mine...Thank you Dick!

LittleTed


Joined: 11/01/2012
Posts: 349

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 18:15

Can anyone tell me how to run a bath please??? and what do i have to fill it with???

Brinsley


Joined: 04/04/2009
Posts: 6858

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 18:22

NewRobert

Is this what you're looking for?!

http://youtu.be/r2tU17Zp8KI



Richard

yenibob


Joined: 13/10/2010
Posts: 1203

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 18:25

Before my time, and the "New Robert" thing is so passée, Brighter people than you did it long ago!



You only serve to confirm the obvious!

Woodspeckie


Joined: 25/01/2009
Posts: 2263

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 18:34

The ice cream man has just come down our street he comes every afternoon at the same time, think I will go for a big whippy with a chocolate log.

Woodspeckie


Joined: 25/01/2009
Posts: 2263

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 18:36

yenibob. Just go and leave us alone we are keeping our minds active with a little fun, obviously not your scene so why join in.

slatnumber7


Joined: 25/08/2010
Posts: 299

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 18:40

Msg 87 Boooo hisss Woodspeckie yenibob is doing just fine and he's just done Brinsley a treat!

hattikins


Joined: 17/02/2008
Posts: 2793

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 18:40

There's always one isn't there

Brinsley


Joined: 04/04/2009
Posts: 6858

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 18:41

Yeniflop

At 82, how can it be before your time? Or was it your time-served in nick during the '60s?!



Richard

Jonesy299


Joined: 07/02/2009
Posts: 367

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 18:43

Can we ensure this string quickly spirals into a slanging match between people....ooer! It has (thanks)

Redwine


Joined: 15/01/2009
Posts: 565

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 18:44

1001 may sell sense of humour they sell nealry everything else - and cheap as well.

How do I get to 1001?

slatnumber7


Joined: 25/08/2010
Posts: 299

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 18:45

SNAFU Jonesy299 SNAFU

Redwine


Joined: 15/01/2009
Posts: 565

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 18:45

I lost my sense of humour - if you find it can you hand it into the Police staion as I am lost without it

LittleTed


Joined: 11/01/2012
Posts: 349

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 18:48

Redwine, 1001 is 2 doors along from the police station 999

Redwine


Joined: 15/01/2009
Posts: 565

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 18:50

Ok yhanks - oh where's the police syation

Sandford


Joined: 17/12/2011
Posts: 133

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 19:05

Has Bob found ThugsRus and do Lemar sell Rowlo's.



Can I get directions to my house



Is it against the law to make a dog 'walk the plank'



Does a right-handed toothbrush discriminate against lefties



Has Phil Bailey ever been here and does he play Chess



Is a Doyen helpful

hattikins


Joined: 17/02/2008
Posts: 2793

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 19:20

The police station is where all the Z cars are parked of course.

Smity



Joined: 14/09/2009
Posts: 826

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 19:21

Rowlo

LMAO

the amount of reply has justified the Post well done

viper


Joined: 14/07/2008
Posts: 119

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 19:57

Do Marshall's sell stripped paint and sky hooks ??











viper

slatnumber7


Joined: 25/08/2010
Posts: 299

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 20:00

No viper but you can get a long weight there!

dippersgirl



Joined: 04/05/2010
Posts: 795

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 20:05

mess 63

if you can push or pull the perambulator, is it a pushmepullyou?

lots of 'bushes' to be trimmed in Dipkarpaz

have you met Camilla the donkey

dippersgirl



Joined: 04/05/2010
Posts: 795

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 20:26

the ice cream van made it to Dippers



http://www.flickr.com/photos/25193786@N02/sets/72157629585273785/

lozroz


Joined: 03/04/2011
Posts: 32

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 21:32

Someone mentioned a search engine at the top?!?!

Top of where?

I haven't seen it.

Where's the station and does it stop at Esentepe?????



Puzzled and confused.

Hector


Joined: 26/08/2008
Posts: 2352

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 21:50

I was just wondering, are there any charities in North Cyprus? Are dogs welcome? Could I make a living selling waste bins?

Hector


Joined: 26/08/2008
Posts: 2352

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 21:51

Oh and can you get the internet?

rowlo



Joined: 12/10/2008
Posts: 4796

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 21:53

if you see the yellow train engine on the way in , should be on your right , thats the station , the line only runs to girne at the minute , the park and ride is still under construction but should be ready for the summer season , please note this is not a high speed link yet , its mainly used by postmen delivering the gas bills .



ps, great to laugh for a change eh

slatnumber7


Joined: 25/08/2010
Posts: 299

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 22:01

Good on yer rowlo good post and only a tad of sniping but I need to know can we buy those skirts that scotch men wear here in Kuzey Kibris?





Cats and pidgeons!

Jeannie


Joined: 04/08/2009
Posts: 3283

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 22:10

Can you get direct flights into N.Cyprus please?

ranger5


Joined: 29/03/2011
Posts: 151

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 22:13

Rowlo, post of the year. Thinking of starting a fund raiser for a football team in need. Looking for accountants,

any ideas?

Jonesy299


Joined: 07/02/2009
Posts: 367

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 22:40

I agree - Rowlo, a brilliant post (and great to see everybody joining in with a great sense of humour). Cyprus44 rules!!!!

dizzycows


Joined: 12/05/2009
Posts: 2736

Message Posted:
14/03/2012 22:57

Yes, I haven't laughed so much in ages !...



To many unhappy threads on 44, it makes you on a downer just to read some of them, but this thread has touched the 'Monty Python' in all of us, shows we all have a carefree nature really ... )))



But has icecream man run out of cigarette flavoured burgers .... he was last seen dinging his dong some where ...

Woodspeckie


Joined: 25/01/2009
Posts: 2263

Message Posted:
15/03/2012 01:17

I am moving to North Cyprus next month and will be opening a shop selling poop scoops and little plastic bags to put the poo in, will I do better in the West or East of Kyrenia? Do I need a work permit to get my own business going? Which school do you recommend for my kids of 6 & 8?

Jeannie


Joined: 04/08/2009
Posts: 3283

Message Posted:
15/03/2012 01:47

Woodspeckie, message 113. This depends - are you flying into Larnaca or Ercan? I don't know whether you are aware of the fact that if coming into Larnaca, you will have to cross a border. I'm not sure whether you can bring a hire car over but I am sure someone on here will be able to advise you on that. With regard to your business selling pooper scoopers, do you know a NC who will be prepared to go into partnership with you, put five million pounds into the business (you can get in back later, by the way) and will you own 50/51% of said business? East or West - this is tricky. Some will say East and some West but I recommend that you go to TRNC, rent for about 6 years and then make up your own mind. With regard to the schooling for your children, this, may, of course, prove to be another minefield. I would suggest you send one of them to private school and one to a state school for a couple of terms and then go for what you think is the best option. Salad is cheap in season

nurseawful



Joined: 06/02/2009
Posts: 5934

Message Posted:
15/03/2012 06:54

I want to buy your Christmas tree but have no credits on my phone and no money at the moment to put them on. So can you call me!



Chris

jimchris09


Joined: 13/02/2009
Posts: 547

Message Posted:
15/03/2012 07:04

Any steam buckets and glass hammers available in TRNC?

flowerfairy


Joined: 17/09/2008
Posts: 1277

Message Posted:
15/03/2012 07:30

Can anyone tell me how much they charge for soda chrystals in Mr Pound?



Mess 100, I was told that Marshalls sold tartan paint, if that helps.

viper


Joined: 14/07/2008
Posts: 119

Message Posted:
15/03/2012 11:44

Thank you flowerfairy.. do you think they stock the Stuart tartan??

It's in fashion this year and I hope I can get it for exterior walls..

I'm off to Marshalls now. Wish me luck, slatnumber7 said I might get a long weight there.







viper

dippersgirl



Joined: 04/05/2010
Posts: 795

Message Posted:
15/03/2012 12:31

Now... Stuart tartan on an outside wall, any wall for that.....yeay!!!

padisha


Joined: 09/07/2011
Posts: 131

Message Posted:
15/03/2012 13:39

İ have 2 black dogs. When they look at each other do they assume they are looking into a mirror? Neither of them have ever shown any interest in scooping their poop. Not sure about your idea for a shop.

Hector


Joined: 26/08/2008
Posts: 2352

Message Posted:
15/03/2012 13:49

I was thinking of bringing my Bugatti Veyron with me when I come to 'live the dream', will it cost anything? Would it be ok to use it to take people to the airport?

hattikins


Joined: 17/02/2008
Posts: 2793

Message Posted:
15/03/2012 13:56

Does anyone know where I can buy a roundtoit, my husband seems to need one!

davpat


Joined: 23/08/2011
Posts: 225

Message Posted:
15/03/2012 16:06

Message 118,if Marshalls cant supply you with a long weight,ask them for 2 short weights,just as good,IMHO

keithcaley



Joined: 13/06/2008
Posts: 2521

Message Posted:
15/03/2012 16:47

hattikins - try here: - http://www.cafepress.co.uk/dd/4400772

You can even print one off yourself - if you ever get aroundtoit, that is...

tarry67


Joined: 16/05/2008
Posts: 1053

Message Posted:
15/03/2012 17:34

Don't deal with car hire people they tell porkies, I had to take my hire car back last week as it had no CD player, and it clearly states on the contract CDW included.

What a cheek.........

britvic



Joined: 05/09/2008
Posts: 3039

Message Posted:
15/03/2012 21:46

What's the best T.V package in NC, I have heard Dopi is good................................... Let the fight begin!

BlueButterfly


Joined: 03/11/2011
Posts: 160

Message Posted:
15/03/2012 21:52

Good grief, is that the time?

dippersgirl



Joined: 04/05/2010
Posts: 795

Message Posted:
15/03/2012 21:55

mess121

Can I have a lift

dizzycows


Joined: 12/05/2009
Posts: 2736

Message Posted:
15/03/2012 22:12

Train don't stop at Lapta on wednesdays ....

rowlo



Joined: 12/10/2008
Posts: 4796

Message Posted:
15/03/2012 22:20

keep on topic britvic , msg 126 .



you trying to get the thread closed



slows down at karaloongaloonga , you can jump of and walk the rest dizzy

Dillon


Joined: 05/02/2012
Posts: 134

Message Posted:
15/03/2012 22:35

When I went to Marshalls for a short weight, I ended up with a long stand!... But seriously…all joking aside… how do I make the water in my bath evacuate in a clockwise whirlpool (looking from the top) and is baby oil made from real babies in the TRNC?

dizzycows


Joined: 12/05/2009
Posts: 2736

Message Posted:
15/03/2012 22:42

when can I plant spaghetti, when will it be ready to be picked ...

LittleTed


Joined: 11/01/2012
Posts: 349

Message Posted:
15/03/2012 22:46

You can only plant it in the saucepan for a few mins normally unlees saucepan not on heated cooker or ring.











Did anyone make Cottage Cheese Today??

Dillon


Joined: 05/02/2012
Posts: 134

Message Posted:
15/03/2012 22:52

I thought it was only in the Months that contained the letter 'S' Augu's't, 'S'eptember and De's'ember?

Dillon


Joined: 05/02/2012
Posts: 134

Message Posted:
15/03/2012 22:54

Picked in A'p'ril or was it harvested in Marc'h'?

shrimp


Joined: 01/09/2010
Posts: 939

Message Posted:
15/03/2012 22:55

I hear the ice cream van has come up with an original name, it is going to be called...... the ice-cream van !!

LittleTed


Joined: 11/01/2012
Posts: 349

Message Posted:
15/03/2012 22:57

And only on days that begin with a "S". "S"aturdays and "S"undays

LittleTed


Joined: 11/01/2012
Posts: 349

Message Posted:
15/03/2012 23:02

Does the Ice Cream Van sell Garden tools??? as the names not to informative.

rowlo



Joined: 12/10/2008
Posts: 4796

Message Posted:
15/03/2012 23:11

no msg 138 , only sells fresh cod .

dizzycows


Joined: 12/05/2009
Posts: 2736

Message Posted:
15/03/2012 23:15

No, its on line ordering only by the ton .... orders for 1999 being taken now ... Dont leave your name and address, as ice cream man is deaf and cant read ..

LittleTed


Joined: 11/01/2012
Posts: 349

Message Posted:
15/03/2012 23:22

Wanted a deaf signer please!!!!

Hold on a minute ,is the Ice Cream Van driver the same one that has got the dead cat in the fridge.It figures he or she was after the Cod

dizzycows


Joined: 12/05/2009
Posts: 2736

Message Posted:
15/03/2012 23:32

it is nibbles ... he exploded chasing the dogs away... .. ice cream sets better if wheels are square ..

LittleTed


Joined: 11/01/2012
Posts: 349

Message Posted:
15/03/2012 23:47

Yeah, but hes not selling ice creams, hes selling garden tools, cod by the ton and a frozen nibbles.

PS. What shape wheels did nibbles have?

Dillon


Joined: 05/02/2012
Posts: 134

Message Posted:
15/03/2012 23:54

Why would anyone want a dead singer?

TheSaint


Joined: 15/01/2012
Posts: 27

Message Posted:
16/03/2012 00:06

Because they dont like doing sowing

Dillon


Joined: 05/02/2012
Posts: 134

Message Posted:
16/03/2012 00:08

We've already discussed the sowing, it needs to be done in the Months that contained the letter 'S' Augu's't, 'S'eptember and De's'ember?

rowlo



Joined: 12/10/2008
Posts: 4796

Message Posted:
16/03/2012 00:11

has any one seen the pussy ? mmeeeeeeeeeeeeeeooooooooooooooowwwwwwwwwww.

Dillon


Joined: 05/02/2012
Posts: 134

Message Posted:
16/03/2012 00:18

Well according to form, poor old nibbles was frozen and exploded while chasing dogs, now in my world that actually constitutes 2 of the cat's nine lives so the request above doesn't sound so bad as I originally thought it did, so where is the cat?

LittleTed


Joined: 11/01/2012
Posts: 349

Message Posted:
16/03/2012 00:25

What cat?? I thought we was talking about nibbles the frozen pussy!!

PS Just like my x wifes



Again great post rowlo!!!!

Sandford


Joined: 17/12/2011
Posts: 133

Message Posted:
16/03/2012 01:12

My friend has a pussy management service and can deal with all your pussy needs. We are doing a 30% reduction on frozen pussy servicing for the month of March. Get in early to avoid disappointment. Your satisfaction is our pleasure.

Redwine


Joined: 15/01/2009
Posts: 565

Message Posted:
16/03/2012 08:57

I have lost my key for my corned beef tin - can I get another oner one from a locksmith? I am starving.

I have a pussy that needs feeding

charlieb


Joined: 17/12/2009
Posts: 95

Message Posted:
16/03/2012 09:36

Its a good job they don't have wind farms in TRNC.

All this uncertainty with Kibtek if they go on strike again would mean they wouldn't have any electricity to make them turn.

Seems a waste of electricity anyway as we have enough wind already this year and should not be wasting electricity making more

hattikins


Joined: 17/02/2008
Posts: 2793

Message Posted:
16/03/2012 09:43

Is that wind from the baked beans which is surely methane, can we cool with that if the gas runs out.

britvic



Joined: 05/09/2008
Posts: 3039

Message Posted:
16/03/2012 11:46

Can someone tell our waiter to hurry up with the tartar sauce, our fish is going cold!

Redwine


Joined: 15/01/2009
Posts: 565

Message Posted:
16/03/2012 11:57

Still can't get into my corned beef tin

Redwine


Joined: 15/01/2009
Posts: 565

Message Posted:
16/03/2012 11:58

Just seen a dog in Esentepe

Redwine


Joined: 15/01/2009
Posts: 565

Message Posted:
16/03/2012 12:00

But no pussy

davpat


Joined: 23/08/2011
Posts: 225

Message Posted:
16/03/2012 12:17

you are not looking in the right places Redwine,loads of them in North Cyprus

dizzycows


Joined: 12/05/2009
Posts: 2736

Message Posted:
16/03/2012 12:55

yes or no... this come with a health warning .... no dogs or cats to answer ..

LittleTed


Joined: 11/01/2012
Posts: 349

Message Posted:
16/03/2012 13:06

Missing!!!!!!!!!!!

10,000 to 12,000 ton oil tanker.It got out the other night and has nt come back yet even though we left the back door open. If seen please phone KIBTEK immediately or we will have to shut down our wind farms.

Redwine


Joined: 15/01/2009
Posts: 565

Message Posted:
16/03/2012 14:57

Still not got into my corned beef - anyone with a spare key?

dizzycows


Joined: 12/05/2009
Posts: 2736

Message Posted:
16/03/2012 15:05

I have ... its up in Alices behind the clock...

Sandford


Joined: 17/12/2011
Posts: 133

Message Posted:
16/03/2012 15:09

Saw a Racoon washing his car, but no pussy either

nurseawful



Joined: 06/02/2009
Posts: 5934

Message Posted:
16/03/2012 15:33

Very windy out here today so please ensure pussy is kept inside in the warmth.



Chris

spider


Joined: 03/01/2009
Posts: 5527

Message Posted:
16/03/2012 15:44

Are there any Snakes about tonight ?









Spider,X

eyebob


Joined: 22/06/2010
Posts: 143

Message Posted:
16/03/2012 16:29

Can you make a decent living carrying a bucket at charity events?

rowlo



Joined: 12/10/2008
Posts: 4796

Message Posted:
17/03/2012 17:03

went to the mexican steak house looking forward to a juicy steak , they served us chicken ?

dizzycows


Joined: 12/05/2009
Posts: 2736

Message Posted:
17/03/2012 22:00

Its 12 0 clock,... what time is it?...

BlueButterfly


Joined: 03/11/2011
Posts: 160

Message Posted:
17/03/2012 22:08

Has anyone got a spare left wellie? He,s eaten mine.

Woodspeckie


Joined: 25/01/2009
Posts: 2263

Message Posted:
17/03/2012 22:08

What is the weather going to be like in December, do I bring my sun cream and mozzie spray?

spider


Joined: 03/01/2009
Posts: 5527

Message Posted:
17/03/2012 22:18

Can I watch English TV on here, if so can you please explain how I find channel 44.







Spider,X

BlueButterfly


Joined: 03/11/2011
Posts: 160

Message Posted:
17/03/2012 22:29

It,s between 43 and 45

Clarissa2


Joined: 12/06/2009
Posts: 1476

Message Posted:
22/03/2012 13:57

I'm recently divorced and relocating from Malta to TRNC in September.

My parrot has a criminal record, so would it be OK if we fly to larnica? Does he need a visa?

How do we get from larnica to gurney, do we cross the border in Pila?



thank you in advance for your answers.





Are any singles clubs for parrots in North Cyprus?

TopTen


Joined: 15/04/2009
Posts: 1246

Message Posted:
22/03/2012 14:41

Can,t help with the corned beef,but I am looking into the pussy...........problem?

davpat


Joined: 23/08/2011
Posts: 225

Message Posted:
22/03/2012 15:51

Spider,



Your getting confused with the perfume!

jimchris09


Joined: 13/02/2009
Posts: 547

Message Posted:
22/03/2012 16:16

Where is Chateau Lambousa...is it on this week?

Clarissa2


Joined: 12/06/2009
Posts: 1476

Message Posted:
22/03/2012 18:30

I've just reported this thread as misleading, as I don't know where it is leading to.

rowlo



Joined: 12/10/2008
Posts: 4796

Message Posted:
22/03/2012 19:05

its leading to anyones house , the guy who gives small loans of 1500 euros of course

jimchris09


Joined: 13/02/2009
Posts: 547

Message Posted:
23/03/2012 09:05

Black panther missing from back garden in Lapta...ferocious and wild...answers to name of "Cuddles"...please help!.

Clarissa2


Joined: 12/06/2009
Posts: 1476

Message Posted:
23/03/2012 09:37

Re: Msg 178,



I'm more interested in the gifts around 45k or will accept large donations.



P.S.Haven't seen panther from Lapta, but there is a python in my garden.

Redwine


Joined: 15/01/2009
Posts: 565

Message Posted:
23/03/2012 10:11

At last seen a pussy, remarkable - funny little things - it purrs when you stroke it

hattikins


Joined: 17/02/2008
Posts: 2793

Message Posted:
23/03/2012 10:43

message 80

My neighbour went back to the UK and had to leave his python, it answers to Monty, would you call out and see if it answers.

jimchris09


Joined: 13/02/2009
Posts: 547

Message Posted:
23/03/2012 13:38

Mystifying disappearance of all yapping dogs in Lapta area since "Cuddles" has been on the loose...wonder why?

Clarissa2


Joined: 12/06/2009
Posts: 1476

Message Posted:
23/03/2012 19:02

Re: Msg 182,



I've checked - the python answers to Burtie, at least it's how my parrot calls him.

Which leads me to another question. My parrot obviously needs some formal education. So can you recommend a good school (east or west) please.



He also requires a fortnightly pedicure. Your suggestions of a nail salon ( east or west) will be greatly appreciated.



On behalf of Soldo, the parrot, many thanks again.

lozroz


Joined: 03/04/2011
Posts: 32

Message Posted:
23/03/2012 21:26

What channels can I get on my dish?

Its an 11" enamel one.

Great for making rubharb pies too.

Can you get rubharb in TRNC?

britvic



Joined: 05/09/2008
Posts: 3039

Message Posted:
23/03/2012 23:56

I never apologise sorry, that's just the way I am....



Anyone seen nibbles yet no sightings for a while, apart from the ice cream man's freezer where he was trying to catch some fish, I did ask after him at the nail bar, they said he was in there last Thursday for a French manicure, nothing after that.



Please peel your eyes back for him...

birdman



Joined: 20/09/2010
Posts: 690

Message Posted:
24/03/2012 09:19

I have a sister who works in the gas industry.



Anyone wana meeter ?



Gerry

Sandford


Joined: 17/12/2011
Posts: 133

Message Posted:
24/03/2012 14:05

Last few days for the 30% discount on your pussy management needs.



We also cater for old birds, specialising in a complete training package which includes 'Parrot phrasing', 'Parrot Fashion' and 'Budgie Jumping'.



All our staff are untrained, illegal and overcharge as standard.



Also do not overlook our Turkey Mate service, sponsored by Puma's, its pythonesque.

dizzycows


Joined: 12/05/2009
Posts: 2736

Message Posted:
24/03/2012 17:15

Which way do I put paint on, I don't want to put it on upside down , is it ok start from the bottom of the tin.......

pollymarples


Joined: 08/08/2010
Posts: 1778

Message Posted:
24/03/2012 21:15

Having read this lot, then wondered why - can anyone tell me where I can buy the will to live?

Clarissa2


Joined: 12/06/2009
Posts: 1476

Message Posted:
24/03/2012 21:32

Re: Msg 190,



It depends where you live now and where you'd want to live, when you buy the will to live: east or west.

BlueButterfly


Joined: 03/11/2011
Posts: 160

Message Posted:
24/03/2012 23:38

I would like to buy a will, but only if someone has left me something in it.

Woodspeckie


Joined: 25/01/2009
Posts: 2263

Message Posted:
25/03/2012 00:24

I will if you will.

Hoylemiller



Joined: 03/09/2010
Posts: 240

Message Posted:
25/03/2012 12:47

They found our ice cream man dead in his van covered in hundreds n thousands...

The police said "he topped himself".

pollymarples


Joined: 08/08/2010
Posts: 1778

Message Posted:
25/03/2012 13:49

I 'will' live wherever I am permitted to,



Your icecream man got to 99 and forgot to change hands Hoylemiller... sad sad storyl

Clarissa2


Joined: 12/06/2009
Posts: 1476

Message Posted:
25/03/2012 13:50

Are there any cucumbers for sale ( east or west)?

Smity



Joined: 14/09/2009
Posts: 826

Message Posted:
25/03/2012 13:54

Just spent a good 20 minuets in stitchers



Thanks guys

nurseawful



Joined: 06/02/2009
Posts: 5934

Message Posted:
25/03/2012 13:57

Clarissa2



No cucumbers left here on the west side think they fed them to the turkey!!



Chris

britvic



Joined: 05/09/2008
Posts: 3039

Message Posted:
25/03/2012 14:10

Never mind cucumbers, what's happened with Cheshire..................................................Cheese?

nurseawful



Joined: 06/02/2009
Posts: 5934

Message Posted:
25/03/2012 14:13

Britvic,



it must have been that bloody turkey again!



Chris

dizzycows


Joined: 12/05/2009
Posts: 2736

Message Posted:
25/03/2012 14:13

Wrong again they were used as ammunition for defence against nibbles the pussy who killed the ice cream man, all because of the fish smelt of lost doggies ....

brother



Joined: 29/01/2010
Posts: 446

Message Posted:
25/03/2012 18:35

I never thought I would find anything so funny on here but my wife and I were in tears of laughter on reading some of the stuff here.



By the way can I buy a dog from the South if I live in the North?