women,, perfect...(joke)

Turbo


Joined: 24/12/2006
Posts: 833

Message Posted:
20/01/2009 01:37

A woman was in town on a shopping trip. She began her day finding the most perfect shoes in the first shop and a beautiful dress on
sale the second.



In the third shop everything had just been reduced to a fiver when her mobile phone rang. It was a female doctor notifying her that her husband had just been in a terrible accident and was in critical condition and in the ICU.



The woman told the doctor to inform her husband where she was and that she'd be there as soon as possible.



As she hung up she realised she was leaving what was shaping up to be her best day ever in the shops. She decided to get in a couple more shops before heading to the hospital.



She ended up shopping the rest of the morning, finishing her
trip with a cup of coffee and a beautiful cream slice complimentary from the last shop. She was jubilant.

Turbo


Joined: 24/12/2006
Posts: 833

Message Posted:
20/01/2009 01:38

Then she remembered her husband. Feeling guilty, she dashed to the hospital. She saw the doctor in the corridor and asked about her husband's condition. The lady doctor glared at her and shouted, 'You went ahead and finished your shopping trip didn't you! I hope you're proud of yourself!



While you were out for the past four hours enjoying yourself in town, your husband has been languishing in the Intensive Care Unit! It's just as well you went ahead and finished, because it will more than likely be the last shopping trip you ever take! For the rest of his life he will require round the clock care. And you'll now be his carer.'



The woman was feeling so guilty she broke down and
 sobbed.



The lady doctor then chuckled and said, 'I'm just pulling your leg. He's dead. What did you buy?'

authentichoccie


Joined: 09/01/2008
Posts: 481

Message Posted:
20/01/2009 10:08

Brilliant!!!!!!!

No1Doyen


Joined: 04/07/2008
Posts: 16617

Message Posted:
20/01/2009 10:09

A Short Story.



One day, long, long ago, there lived a woman who did not whine, nag, or bitch.



But it was a long time ago, and it was just that one day.



The End.

fire starter


Joined: 19/06/2008
Posts: 3401

Message Posted:
20/01/2009 14:24

turbo

you just reminded me of why i miss london. shopping!

(the only thing i miss.)

Jayne


Joined: 01/12/2008
Posts: 499

Message Posted:
20/01/2009 14:26

Nice light banter....lets have more of it!

Kitty1


Joined: 15/03/2007
Posts: 683

Message Posted:
20/01/2009 14:52

Love the joke! Fab! Here's another along the same lines. The shortest fairy tale ever:



Once upon a time, a girl asked a guy "Will you marry me?"



The guy said, "NO!"



And the girl lived happily ever after and went shopping, dancing, drank martinis, always had a clean house, never had to cook, didn't get fat and had all the hot water to herself. The end.

No1Doyen


Joined: 04/07/2008
Posts: 16617

Message Posted:
20/01/2009 15:10

A women described that one night, while she and her husband were making love, she suddenly noticed something sticking in his ear. When she asked him what it was he replied,

"Be quiet, woman! I'm listening to the cricket."

Turbo


Joined: 24/12/2006
Posts: 833

Message Posted:
26/01/2009 10:05

Jayne re:message #6, having just gone through the rules,

rule 6 (i think)we can only post one joke a week.

Someone else has to add one, I have used up my quota..

Harold2555



Joined: 19/04/2008
Posts: 1139

Message Posted:
26/01/2009 10:29

Turbo



I am liberally interpreting that rule to mean one Joke thread a week. Once you've started it you can post more.



Promise I won't ban you if you do



Harold

spangles


Joined: 22/10/2008
Posts: 411

Message Posted:
26/01/2009 11:54

Turbo, thank you. Great way to start the week - with a good laugh.

Skogsy


Joined: 15/05/2008
Posts: 339

Message Posted:
26/01/2009 12:26

Hey Turb's

What do you reckon?

What about if it's not exactly a joke but a funny story?

Thread entitled "Funny Story"

Do we risk the wrath of the sharpened and honed edged tongues of the Mods lashing us with the "Yellow Card" button and receiving a ban after two?

Golly Gosh.



Sir Skogs