Letter to David Cameron -bit of a laugh :-)

ilovecyprus


Joined: 08/05/2007
Posts: 2880

Message Posted:
19/05/2011 11:44

Dear Mr Cameron,



Please find below our suggestion for fixing the UK's economy.



Instead of giving billions of pounds to banks that will squander the money on lavish parties and unearned bonuses, use the following plan.



You can call it the Patriotic Retirement Plan:



There are about 10 million people over 50 in the work force.



Pay them £1 million each severance for early retirement with the following stipulations:



1) They MUST retire.

Ten million job openings - unemployment fixed



2) They MUST buy a new British car.

Ten million cars ordered - Car Industry fixed



3) They MUST either buy a house or pay off their mortgage -

Housing Crisis fixed



4) They MUST send their kids to school/college/university -

Crime rate fixed



5) They MUST buy £100 WORTH of alcohol/tobacco a week .....

And there's your money back in duty/tax etc



It can't get any easier than that!

Lilli



Joined: 21/07/2008
Posts: 13081

Message Posted:
19/05/2011 11:49

Lets see if you get a reply. Why dont they think of that xx

ilovecyprus


Joined: 08/05/2007
Posts: 2880

Message Posted:
19/05/2011 11:59

msge 2



Its not my idea Lilli

ilk22


Joined: 18/05/2011
Posts: 136

Message Posted:
19/05/2011 12:09

You forgot point 6



6) Must have private Health Insurance (especially if you adhere to Point 5)

NHS crises fixed

mmmmmm



Joined: 19/12/2008
Posts: 8398

Message Posted:
19/05/2011 12:09

It's probably illegal as it is infringes the HR of those under 50 :D

ilovecyprus


Joined: 08/05/2007
Posts: 2880

Message Posted:
19/05/2011 12:17

msge 4



Like it



msge 5



true

DutchCrusader



Joined: 19/05/2008
Posts: 11281

Message Posted:
19/05/2011 12:22

On this board (April 28, 2011): ▶ [ http://www.cyprus44.com/forums/62060.asp ].

ilk22


Joined: 18/05/2011
Posts: 136

Message Posted:
19/05/2011 12:22

Msge 1 , you should run for PM, you could get in with a policy like that! Hope for all and something to work hard towards!

ilovecyprus


Joined: 08/05/2007
Posts: 2880

Message Posted:
19/05/2011 12:29

On a serious note, I believe the liberals are proposing that everyone be given shares in the bailed out banks. This would net everyone between 500 and 1000 pounds

mmmmmm



Joined: 19/12/2008
Posts: 8398

Message Posted:
19/05/2011 12:29

While we are talking economics.. Here's an Australian version of the 'two cows' economic model..



http://www.damnlol.com/world-economic-model-unit-cows-220.html

ilovecyprus


Joined: 08/05/2007
Posts: 2880

Message Posted:
19/05/2011 12:32

msge 10



like it

waddo


Joined: 29/11/2008
Posts: 1966

Message Posted:
19/05/2011 12:55

If you are going to give everyone over 50 (in the workforce) 1M each then those over 50 not in the work force won't get anything? Another point to fix first, however, if you make it so its law then everyone will get 1M each at age 50 and then you can do away with state pensions as well. At the same time you can do away with free prescriptions, bus passes, etc,etc. Sounds silly but would work after a few years - it means that people would not have their own pensions either and would have more cash to pay off any existing mortgages or to just squander and boost the economy.



Better yet - just give all those who have moved out of the country on a permanent basis and are also members of C44 1M each to stay away!!!!!! Where do I collect mine???????

ilovecyprus


Joined: 08/05/2007
Posts: 2880

Message Posted:
19/05/2011 13:02

msge 12



"Better yet - just give all those who have moved out of the country on a permanent basis and are also members of C44 1M each to stay away!!!!!! Where do I collect mine???????"



Like it





We had better find a way to stop people blowing their million on a night of sheer unadulterated debauchery

That could be my downfall